Have The Relationship You Want

If you’re with a man and you’re not feeling great at the moment — if you’re feeling a bit insecure, a bit anxious, a bit tense, unsure of yourself — you are being TRIGGERED.

Now, the only thing left to discover is the why about your being triggered, so you can use my Tools to get yourself to a better-feeling place.

So here are the two possibilities:

1. He doesn’t like you as much as he is REQUIRED to like you in order for you to spend any time with him at all. Period.

So, let’s say you’re feeling insecure, anxious, tense — if he doesn’t like you the way he’s supposed to like you, what that will kick in More…

Here’s a letter from Lila, who’s stuck in what I know is a VERY common situation:

“Rori, we’ve been engaged for almost three years. Whenever we set a date for our wedding, he changes it when the time draws near. I tell people that we are permanently engaged.

Also, our sex life is really bad. We have no sex life. He says he is going to see a doctor, but keeps putting it off. I am beginning to worry that I might not want to be in a sexless marriage. Thanks, Lila”

Here’s my answer:

Whoa, Lila – beware.

Many, many men – and most past a certain age – have erection difficulties.

It’s about stress and environment and too much estrogen being produced because of food…lots of things. More…

Here’s a great comment from a man (let’s call him Edgar) with great insight and tips for how to get closer to a man emotionally, help him open up to you, and just simply talk with him. He’s writing it in response to Laurie, who wrote about the man she’s seeing: “I want to know the real man. He is so protective that I don’t believe I’ll ever really know his heart.” Edgar says:

“No you don’t want to know the real man! Trust me on this, it will only make you sad and bewildered. We guys don’t think like you -  we don’t care about the same things you do.

Every time I have been able to share my true heart with a woman she has thrown it away. More…

I have a love/hate relationship with the idea of psychic ability and psychics. I’ve taken sessions with lovely friends who are psychics, like Ann O’Brien and Lisbeth Kimbrough and Lorrie Kazan, and “channelers,” and “intuitives” and “sensitives” – and when they are women (and men) I love and feel good with and trust – I welcome their insights – as long as they do not even MENTION anything about or “in”  the future.

I do NOT believe that ANYTHING is predetermined. I believe that everything morphs (even that bacteria and cells in our body that we label “bad” at one moment can turn “good” in the next…and there’s science to back that one up…).

I do believe that we are driven to repeat situations over and over until we learn what we need to learn from that situation, even from that pain, and that to interrupt those “patterns” takes the work of self-awareness and the willingness to move into the unknown: the “unknown” being everything that ISN’T in the patterns we’re so used to repeating and re-enacting.

Here’s a letter from Maureen that lets me jump off a bit into this:

“Hi Rori :

Remember how I was telling you about that guy in France that has a girlfriend…?…well, she ended up calling me and telling me that she is his wife …drama. Which is not true (she’s not his wife) – in any case – too much drama so we ended our chats (me and man)..

What amuses me is that I have been attracted to these men that I have to win somehow over someone or something More…