When you don’t feel loved, honored, cared for, appreciated – how do you say that to your man?
If I made it a game for you, where you couldn’t vent, or yell, or complain, or make him wrong – or even say the word “you” to him – how would you say it?
In the most truthful, fully expressed way possible?
Write it out for yourself (and post it here if you like) – and then TRANSLATE it into Feeling Messages.
Just rework what you instinctively want to say – how you want to hurl your upset at him – and write it all in POETRY, from your heart.
Make it only from you, sharing your feeling state and not linking it at ALL to what has happened or what he’s done or not done, or who he seems to be or not be….
And what if there is no man right now?
If you’re Circular Dating and finding that “intimacy” is about your intimacy with YOU much of the time?
It’s the question: “How can I feel sexy, or lovely, or desirable, or “intimate” if there’s no man here to feel that with?”
And the answer – if you really ask yourself – has to be: All this has to happen inside ME, first.
Love has to circulate in your OWN inner system before you can fully experience it in relationship with the world – otherwise what happens is:
We intellectually take in that there’s a man, in relationship with us. We think our way through it, we experience the physical aspects of it to some degree, we experience emotionality to some degree – but all the depth, all of the REAL experience just slips by us.
We make assumptions about what’s going on. About who we are, about who he is, and about what this is supposed to look like.
We ignore inner voices that are telling us that this is all for US to “make up” however we wish to “make it up” – and steadfastly choose to see things as we always have.
We assume that a lack of “chemistry” at the beginning of knowing a man means “love” isn’t possible.
We assume “true love” is what it’s like in the movies, without considering that perhaps it looks and feels completely different in OUR real life.
We are more impressed by a feeling of yearning inside us than a feeling of contentment.
We judge all kinds of things – and the more power we give to our image of a man – the less power we give ourselves to feel, organically, what feels right for us - instead of what we “think” is right for us.
Intimacy is where it’s at – so how can you FEEL a sense of intimacy when there’s no man in your life at the moment, or the man in your life just doesn’t feel emotionally intimate to you?
For me it starts with feeling intimate with ME – where I’m hearing all the voices inside me and not ignoring any of them.
How about you?