Have The Relationship You Want

When DeAnna of the Bachelorette chose Jesse, who then proposed to her on the spot (as he promised to do) – none of us had any idea if she’d made the “right” choice.

We could feel that both Jason and Jesse made her happy – and only hope that her choice of Jesse was real and would get her to Happy Ever After – forever.

But I was worried for DeAnna.

In the “After The Final Rose” show, DeAnna and Jesse came on together, and DeAnna’s “energy” was so “forward leaning” to Jesse (if you’ve read my work or have my Have The relationship You Want ebook and programs, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about, and I’ll be exploring those concepts of “leaning back” and “leaning forward” in later posts) that I saw her actually leaning in to him for a kiss over and over again. Jesse responded by kissing her – but the energy was clearly and obviously flowing from DeAnna to Jesse instead of the way it SHOULD BE – from HIM to HER.

Perhaps it was the excitement, the TV show, the audience. Perhaps in the time they spend together alone, Jesse’s as “into her” as he appeared to be during the “competition.” But – perhaps DeAnna, who so CLEARLY got SOFTER during the last weeks of the show, is slowly returning to her harder-edged, more emotionally closed and masculine-energy, forward-leaning style, and pushing Jesse back into his more “laid back” style.

I’m going to follow them over the next year, because I really believe DeAnna and this whole “reality show” experience is a great teaching Tool. For now, let’s work a bit with the concept of “Leaning Back.” Here’s a basic tip on how to do it:

1. Notice how you’re sitting or standing when you’re with your man. Notice if your body is tilted forward or tilted backward. Notice if you’re leaning in to him, and he’s stretched out and leaning back – or if you’re leaning back and he’s sitting up and paying attention to you.
2. If he’s leaning forward, notice how it feels, and if you’re leaning back, notice how it feels. Notice what he’s doing. Now SWITCH. Change your body position. Lean forward or backward. Now – see what happens to your man. He will most likely AUTOMATICALLY shift his position to COUNTER you.
3. Now, whenever you feel like you’re working too hard, or want something from him he’s not offering, or feeling uncomfortable – notice that you’re probably leaning toward him and then SWITCH your body position to LEANING BACK.

This is an almost magical way to shift the entire dynamic of your relationship in a very simple, fast way. Let me know how this works for you, and then you’ll be ready to try so many of my other Tools – where you can create a complete TURNAROUND in your relationship just by changing the WORDS and body language you use.

Love, Rori