Here’s a great guest post from Ariella Forstein – who’s brilliant on my Modern Siren program:
by Ariella Forstein
So many women change their voice in order to become what they think is attractive to men. Some raise their voices higher; some make their voices softer, and most do both.
It is no wonder women do this, because our society deems the “sexy” female voice as airy, light, high-pitched, and smooth.
If altering the voice is easy and just a matter of fitting in, why do I, as a Vocal Coach cringe when I hear women doing it?
Because this voice is inauthentic.
If you use this voice, it is a clear sign that you are not fully comfortable with yourself. It may help you attract a man, but likely one that desires an insecure, needy woman.
Is that you?
I didn’t think so.
And even if it is, you can become empowered by taking necessary action to alter both your voice and your confidence.
Steps to a confident, authentic, attractive voice:
- When no one is around, speak to yourself freely about something you love.
- Observe the ease, joy and enthusiasm with which you speak!
- Feel your breath connected to your voice, supporting it ever so wonderfully. The emphasis will be on what you’re saying, rather than what you’re thinking. This is your authentic voice.
- Practice using this voice (no matter how new or scary) on the phone with a trusted friend. Optional: Tell the friend you’re doing this, and ask them to remind you to use it when you speak with them.
- Then use this voice in the grocery store with the cashier.
- Then approach an attractive man with it, or try it on a date.
This is one of numerous pathways to re-discovering your authentic voice. You know better than anyone if you are able to use it easily or not. If you are still searching for it, remember, it takes time to get comfortable enough with yourself to speak authentically.
When you realize that you can be more vocally authentic and take action to change, know that you are doing something bold and beautiful, and others will admire you for it. That should enhance your confidence!
Real men want real women. The more you are comfortable with yourself, the sooner you’ll attract a man who is comfortable with himself. And that, my friends, is attractive!
Ariella Forstein is a Vocal Empowerment Coach, healing and enhancing voices & lives for transformational, obtainable forward movement. Learn more at: www.AriellaApproach.com
From Rori: Ariella is unique, wonderful, and inspiring…if you want to learn more about how working with your voice can empower and transform you inside and out – check her out…