Every once in awhile I find an article or a post out there that I KNOW will be really helpful to you – and here’s one, from “AdviceMaven” at http://luvem-leavem.blogspot.com/. It’s about “New Trends in Speed Dating,” – the tips here are wonderful all by themselves, and I’m going to add a way to use this information in even MORE ways. Here’s the article:
“Speed dating is a popular solution for singles who are pressed for time and are either leery of or have had no success with internet dating. Whether you’ve always wanted to try speed dating, or you haven’t tried it in awhile, you’ll be surprised at how many new options there are. If the thought of sitting across the table from a steady stream of strangers in awkward silence has kept you from trying speed dating, then read on.
Rock ‘n Roll Dating- Combining speed dating with live music, bands perform in between 20 minute dating sessions. Participants are matched up ahead of time with others who share their musical preferences. The company is based in Boston, but lists events across the country.
Two things that I especially like about this concept are:
- Whether you discover your soul mate or not, you’ll discover some great local bands.
- Having similar taste in music is a great foundation, and if you run out of things to talk about, you can always talk about the music.
Speed Bowling- A group of ladies and a group of men bowl as a team alternating frames until all 10 frames are played. The ladies then bowl with a new group of men until all the groups have met each other.
What I like about this concept:
- First, I like that you alternate frames, so it doesn’t matter if you’re a lousy bowler.
- You can find our a lot about a man by the way he acts when he bowls. Does he stomp like an infant if he throws a gutter ball? Does he jump up and down and scream “in your face” if he gets a strike? Very useful to know before going for that second date.
Even more speed dating activities: If bowling isn’t your thing, WeekendDating.com also has speed golf, speed cooking, speed dancing and much more. Chances are if you have a hobby, they have a speed dating event centered around it.
Dinner Party Concept- Singles enjoy dinner in a group setting of 4 men and 4 women. The awkwardness of one-on-one traditional speed dating is removed by the group setting, and the venues tend to be classier. There are 2 ways these events are run:
- Traditional Dinner Party- run by companies like Eight at Eight where all 8 diners remain at the same table all evening.
- Rotating Dinner Party- Run by Aish New York, Dinner D8 is an event where singles are placed with a new party of 8 for each course of the meal.
Big pluses of the dinner party approach are:
- No matter how the evening goes you are going to get a nice meal. No nachos and bar nuts at these gatherings.
- You’re going to meet men who can dress properly for a date. I get lots of complaints about men who just can’t shake the grunge look, which seriously restricts where he will want to take you on future dates.
Online Speed Dating- For those of you who want the convenience of online dating and the in-person quality of off line dating there is SpeedDate.com. You will have a 3 minute date via live video or chat. After 3 minutes you each vote if you want to continue the date. If there is a match the chat continues, if there is not, then you move on to another person.
This is the ultimate dating format for all the workaholic singles that I know because:
- No extensive questionnaires to fill out like regular online dating- the excuse that you don’t have time to think up answers for all those crazy profile questions is gone! Plus who cares which cartoon character best describes you anyway?
- Convenient- You don’t have to drive anywhere, and you don’t have to wait for the next live event. Although this is the only speed dating you can do in your slippers, if you’re going to be on video please remember to change out of your pajamas.
So there they are, all the new speed dating options that are available to singles. After reviewing them one final time, I think I can truly say that there is something for everyone. So if you’ve been feeding your friends that same old sob story about why speed dating isn’t for you, you’d better hope they don’t get a hold of this list.”
Here’s my two cents: Okay – a lot of these sites are not in your area – They’re in New York, or other big cities, and you may not have something like it where you live. Or they may have age restrictions, or they cost too much. So – what you want to do is LOOK FOR THEM.
Look for events that you could enjoy even if there were no decent men there, that fit your budget, that are close enough to you so you don’t have to make it a big deal travel-wise. AND look for singles events, lectures, slide shows, store and gallery openings at local places – the bowling alley, the dance school, the health food market, the sporting goods store, the dog park…
THIS is the ONLY way I want you to be pro-active. The idea is not to go after MEN, but to go after opportunities to practice the Rori Raye Tools. In other words – it’s about Circular Dating 5 minutes at a time – WHEREVER you are.
If it’s a formal speed dating event, like these (and I KNOW there’s some kind of Speed Dating event near where you live – and the “Dinner Party” idea is very, very popular in many cities and towns) – you can use your Masculine Energy to get you to the event, and help you walk in the door and sign up. And THEN, from the moment you have your name tag and your paperwork, you get to be a GIRL!!
There’s a structure for you to follow. You just do what they tell you, sit where they tell you, get up when they tell you, and you can STAY in GIRL energy the entire time. You get to practice every single Tool – Listening at Level 2, Leaning Back, Passion Stories. You get to practice all your Feeling Messages – and you can use your same “Speeches” – like “No Girlfriend” speeches and “How it feels when…” speeches, if he asks what you “think” about relationships and what you “want ” over and over and over again. Talk about PRACTICE.
Think of how much time you’ll save!
The most important “take-away” here is that the bowling party and dinner party and rock-n-roll party work because they’re about something other than “Dating.” You can go to have fun bowling, or eating, or dancing. And also be escorted through a systematic way to practice. And, of course, as a bonus – meet men. But that’s NOT THE GOAL, here.
A man – a great man – will show up as you are more and more able to RECEIVE him when he shows up. When and where he shows up is NOT under your CONTROL. And you don’t want it to be. You want this to be about the last part of the Rori Raye Mantra – “Be Surprised.”
Make opportunities for yourself to practice the Tools and HEAL yourself from all your old relationships and beliefs about yourself and men that have been holding you back – find EVENTS. Find FUN THINGS. Find things to do out there that you actually enjoy – so that you can get dressed and go out without that feeling of dread you get when you’re going to a bar in hopes of meeting a man.
See PAST the goal of meeting the man. Go for the EXPERIENCE. And even if the experience turns out not to be fun, find the joy of it in the learning, in the practicing, in the Experimenting, in the Experience…(You’ll find the full “6 Good E’s in my Modern Siren Program, for now just focus on Experiment and Experience).
I promise you – this is the kind of Masculine Energy “Doing” that will allow you to surrender into your Feminine Energy “Being.” This is the way to switch “boy” and “girl” hats for the fastest possible results.
Let me know how this post and AdviceMaven have helped you…Love, Rori