The thing about being a doormat is – it’s not very attractive to men.
The thing we’re afraid of is the thing they most want – a sense that we know who we are, love who we are, and will retain ourselves even as we become deeply involved and invested in a relationship.
So – what are we missing in getting this message out?
We’re either giving instructions about what we want, disapproving of what a man is doing, or just throwing ourselves at his feet.
This just plain gets you nowhere.
Strong on the inside, soft on the outside is something completely different.
It’s sort of – “I’m Okay – You’re Okay. Now, I’m open to seeing what happens when we’re together.
It’s not letting chemistry turn your awareness of yourself to mush.
It’s not letting your mind run your heart.
It’s knowing the difference between your heart and chemistry.
It’s holding onto what you want in a relationship, even though you’re crying over a particular man who isn’t filling the bill.
It’s doing the Tools without hovering over the results.
It’s using what you learn from your results to motivate you to practice the Tools even more – and to practice the SPECIFIC Tools that get you the best feeling feelings – regardless of what your mind thinks of the “results” with any particular man.
It’s so loving exactly what’s happening and what’s already happening – regardless of what your mind thinks about it - that regret, “what if,” “if only,” and wishing just disappear from your life.