Comments on: No Relationship Closure Needed http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/ Marriage & Relationship Advice From Rori Raye Thu, 09 Sep 2010 17:29:49 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=140 By: Rori Raye http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-43918 Rori Raye Mon, 07 Jun 2010 07:56:35 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-43918 T - Welcome - and so thrilled to hear you talking this way! Go girl! Love, Rori T – Welcome – and so thrilled to hear you talking this way! Go girl! Love, Rori

]]> By: T http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-43893 T Mon, 07 Jun 2010 05:37:04 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-43893 you made my day. i'm so happy to know that i don't need closure. my boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me 2 weeks ago because he "hasn't been in love with me for a year." i am getting over the heartbreak because my friends and family did not like him and made me realize what an asshole he truly was. i wasn't sure if i needed closure or not, but you're right: I DONT NEED CLOSURE. it will hurt me more for him to say more nasty things to me. i am moving on and i DONT need CLOSURE to help me. thank you rori you are amazing and girls, you don't need closure. there is a man out there for everyone! you made my day. i’m so happy to know that i don’t need closure. my boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me 2 weeks ago because he “hasn’t been in love with me for a year.” i am getting over the heartbreak because my friends and family did not like him and made me realize what an asshole he truly was. i wasn’t sure if i needed closure or not, but you’re right: I DONT NEED CLOSURE. it will hurt me more for him to say more nasty things to me. i am moving on and i DONT need CLOSURE to help me. thank you rori you are amazing and girls, you don’t need closure. there is a man out there for everyone!

]]> By: Rori Raye http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-20505 Rori Raye Thu, 12 Nov 2009 23:33:28 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-20505 ABC - This missing piece here is YOUR LIFE!!! The happy meadow with sunshine that you walk yourself into - you can help yourself with my Riffing Tool here - and make a chanelling List...find the post about it, and you can see everyone's lists...Love, Rori ABC – This missing piece here is YOUR LIFE!!! The happy meadow with sunshine that you walk yourself into – you can help yourself with my Riffing Tool here – and make a chanelling List…find the post about it, and you can see everyone’s lists…Love, Rori

]]> By: ABC http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-20367 ABC Wed, 11 Nov 2009 00:04:48 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-20367 ok, i know in Reconnect your relationship, rori you said to walk through the dark tunnel out to the meadow and better view and happy lives. i know that i need to channel, but sometimes i just go back and forth with anger and fear, fear of loosing him and letting go, angry that he's not sorry for what ignoring me, then i go back to guilty that i ignore him back, then angry and depression again. i am trying to do what you said in the program, but i feel that i am going around and around but yet to find the sunlight and hope. why do we leave that door open to be softer to someone who's hurt our feelings?? why do we even want to "be surprised?" by that person who neglected us? i find myself fighting my own feelings about giving him another chance and/or letting go of him. anxiety, is a big issue for me. ok, i know in Reconnect your relationship, rori you said to walk through the dark tunnel out to the meadow and better view and happy lives.

i know that i need to channel, but sometimes i just go back and forth with anger and fear, fear of loosing him and letting go, angry that he’s not sorry for what ignoring me, then i go back to guilty that i ignore him back, then angry and depression again.

i am trying to do what you said in the program, but i feel that i am going around and around but yet to find the sunlight and hope.

why do we leave that door open to be softer to someone who’s hurt our feelings?? why do we even want to “be surprised?” by that person who neglected us?

i find myself fighting my own feelings about giving him another chance and/or letting go of him.

anxiety, is a big issue for me.

]]> By: Rori Raye http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-13445 Rori Raye Sun, 26 Jul 2009 19:23:43 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-13445 Sunshine - Welcome, and thank you for your lovely post...Rori Sunshine – Welcome, and thank you for your lovely post…Rori

]]> By: Sunshine http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-13430 Sunshine Sun, 26 Jul 2009 07:42:59 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-13430 Wow, this is the first time to this site. I think if we are still with ourselves the answer is there. I think the heart always knows what is real. I believe that knowing yourself in your love is important either you can or can't give yourself to a man sexually without any feelings of remorse or quilt. I think some men are worthy of your love and some aren't. Most important thing is to love yourself and this also takes time. Wow, this is the first time to this site. I think if we are still with ourselves the answer is there. I think the heart always knows what is real. I believe that knowing yourself in your love is important either you can or can’t give yourself to a man sexually without any feelings of remorse or quilt. I think some men are worthy of your love and some aren’t. Most important thing is to love yourself and this also takes time.

]]> By: Dana http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-5467 Dana Fri, 13 Feb 2009 21:51:29 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-5467 thanks for this.. just wanted i needed to read right now in my life. thanks for this.. just wanted i needed to read right now in my life.

]]> By: Cassandra http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-5429 Cassandra Fri, 13 Feb 2009 13:53:13 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-5429 Alias Girl, I was so happy to hear from you! I could totally relate to what you were saying about literally freezing up because there are times that I do that exact same thing. Mostly it happens to me when Charles does or says something that is spirit breaking or is so down-right nasty and hurtful that I just can't take anymore and I just want to disappear. I can't move, I can't say anything, I can't do anything in those moments. Thankfully it does not happen alot but I have been thru it. I have not however been able to riff myself thru it when it does happen but now with this post and remembering yours - it is my hope that if it happens to me again I will be able to handle it differently. He does not do that alot - it is always in the midst of a huge arguement and we don't have those often at all, thank God! I am so glad that you are able to riff and get back to a better place. I have made a mental note if this so that if it does happen to me again whether it is triggered by C or anyone or anything else I will hopefully remember what to do to get myself back into better feeling emotions. I have become almost HYPERsensitive in a way as to what I am feeling in any given moment and am really trying to stay present and if my emotions go to a place where it does not feel good to me I try to look at why....what is going on around me or triggering me to feel this way BUT there are still alot of times where I am feeling nothing and that I can't get to where I can feel something or know what it is that I am feeling. I hope that made some sense!! :-) It seems that either know for sure what I am feeling or I am feeling nothing at all and those are the moments that I am trying to work with ......feeling nothing at all or now knowing what I am feeling. Those for me are the moments where I get paralyzed and like you, can't move. I am encouraged to hear taht you are moving through all of that!! Thanks for mentioning that you feel that I am indeed healing. That made me feel good! Baby steps I guess right?!! I send you a huge flower hug AG with lots of love! XOXOXO Cassandra Alias Girl,
I was so happy to hear from you! I could totally relate to what you were saying about literally freezing up because there are times that I do that exact same thing. Mostly it happens to me when Charles does or says something that is spirit breaking or is so down-right nasty and hurtful that I just can’t take anymore and I just want to disappear. I can’t move, I can’t say anything, I can’t do anything in those moments. Thankfully it does not happen alot but I have been thru it. I have not however been able to riff myself thru it when it does happen but now with this post and remembering yours – it is my hope that if it happens to me again I will be able to handle it differently. He does not do that alot – it is always in the midst of a huge arguement and we don’t have those often at all, thank God! I am so glad that you are able to riff and get back to a better place. I have made a mental note if this so that if it does happen to me again whether it is triggered by C or anyone or anything else I will hopefully remember what to do to get myself back into better feeling emotions. I have become almost HYPERsensitive in a way as to what I am feeling in any given moment and am really trying to stay present and if my emotions go to a place where it does not feel good to me I try to look at why….what is going on around me or triggering me to feel this way BUT there are still alot of times where I am feeling nothing and that I can’t get to where I can feel something or know what it is that I am feeling. I hope that made some sense!! :-) It seems that either know for sure what I am feeling or I am feeling nothing at all and those are the moments that I am trying to work with ……feeling nothing at all or now knowing what I am feeling. Those for me are the moments where I get paralyzed and like you, can’t move. I am encouraged to hear taht you are moving through all of that!! Thanks for mentioning that you feel that I am indeed healing. That made me feel good! Baby steps I guess right?!! I send you a huge flower hug AG with lots of love!
XOXOXO
Cassandra

]]> By: alias girl http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-5423 alias girl Fri, 13 Feb 2009 08:55:29 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-5423 cassandra i really liked rori's reply to you as well. i related to it. i know for me i have trauma trapped in my body or pscyhe or whatever fom my childhood. i can't access it or clear it out on demand. i wish bc if i could i would just tackle it all in a week and be done with it! but it really only comes up when i get frozen or if i get triggered with anger by something. if i really really pay attention in those two times i can hela parts of me. especially for me when i get frozen. i literally shut down and feel like i must stop everything and just stay very very still. i literally freeze up. and it seems no feelings are happening. but as soon as i riff in my frozen sate i access feelings and sometimes it's bizarre stuff that i don't even undrstand why i am feeling what i feel. riffing is the most significant tool for me. you will heal in your own time. you are healing. i see it. i feel happy and also relieved for it. xoxo cassandra i really liked rori’s reply to you as well. i related to it. i know for me i have trauma trapped in my body or pscyhe or whatever fom my childhood. i can’t access it or clear it out on demand. i wish bc if i could i would just tackle it all in a week and be done with it! but it really only comes up when i get frozen or if i get triggered with anger by something. if i really really pay attention in those two times i can hela parts of me. especially for me when i get frozen. i literally shut down and feel like i must stop everything and just stay very very still. i literally freeze up. and it seems no feelings are happening. but as soon as i riff in my frozen sate i access feelings and sometimes it’s bizarre stuff that i don’t even undrstand why i am feeling what i feel.

riffing is the most significant tool for me. you will heal in your own time. you are healing. i see it. i feel happy and also relieved for it. xoxo

]]> By: Cassandra http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/love-life/no-relationship-closure-needed/comment-page-1/#comment-5371 Cassandra Thu, 12 Feb 2009 17:23:46 +0000 http://blog.havetherelationshipyouwant.com/?p=311#comment-5371 Rori.....please accept m,y sincerest apologies that I am just now...finally getting your response to me! I am so sorry that I just got it. Things have been so busy for me that I have only been able to keep up with the "ask your questions here' page/ posts and just now had a chance to check these other posts. I so apologize for that. I feel so SPECIAL that you responded to me personally.....thank you. That feels so wonderful and very special...thank you. BTW...I am loving Re-Connect! I listen to it every day and am focusing on the emotions CD and the one about receiving love. I try to at least listen to 1 of those each day if not both of them! I had to giggle when I read your response to my post above - where you told me to get out of my boat! leave it to me to try to find an easy way around dealing with the soup and the REAL feelings right??! Everyone else can just get in and muddle thru their soup but no....I have to get in a boat!! At least it made me giggle and not cry though right?! LOL :-) You said this.... "You have to get to the bottom, you have to go through it. Feeling on edge and depressed and overwhelmed is your clue that you’re trying to avoid some feelings. And I guarantee you, as soon as you touch those feelings and let them out a bit - writing, speaking them to someone - you’ll get to a better place BENEATH those feelings - peace." I really don't feel like I know how. I don't know how to really FEEL those feelings that I am clearly trying to avoid. I really don't know how to get to them and allow myself to really feel them. And if I can't feel them fully I can't get thru them to the other side....where peace awaits. I just don't know how and because of that you are right.....I feel I am paralyzed by it. How do I get to where I can allow myself to FEEL these things? Do you or anyone here have any suggestions as to how I can do that? Unless I get to the point where I can allow myself to feel them I am scared that I will stay paralyzed so to speak. I send you all so much love and tons of hugs! XOXOXO Cassandra Rori…..please accept m,y sincerest apologies that I am just now…finally getting your response to me! I am so sorry that I just got it. Things have been so busy for me that I have only been able to keep up with the “ask your questions here’ page/ posts and just now had a chance to check these other posts. I so apologize for that. I feel so SPECIAL that you responded to me personally…..thank you. That feels so wonderful and very special…thank you. BTW…I am loving Re-Connect! I listen to it every day and am focusing on the emotions CD and the one about receiving love. I try to at least listen to 1 of those each day if not both of them!

I had to giggle when I read your response to my post above – where you told me to get out of my boat! leave it to me to try to find an easy way around dealing with the soup and the REAL feelings right??! Everyone else can just get in and muddle thru their soup but no….I have to get in a boat!! At least it made me giggle and not cry though right?! LOL :-)

You said this….
“You have to get to the bottom, you have to go through it. Feeling on edge and depressed and overwhelmed is your clue that you’re trying to avoid some feelings. And I guarantee you, as soon as you touch those feelings and let them out a bit – writing, speaking them to someone – you’ll get to a better place BENEATH those feelings – peace.”

I really don’t feel like I know how. I don’t know how to really FEEL those feelings that I am clearly trying to avoid. I really don’t know how to get to them and allow myself to really feel them. And if I can’t feel them fully I can’t get thru them to the other side….where peace awaits. I just don’t know how and because of that you are right…..I feel I am paralyzed by it. How do I get to where I can allow myself to FEEL these things? Do you or anyone here have any suggestions as to how I can do that? Unless I get to the point where I can allow myself to feel them I am scared that I will stay paralyzed so to speak.

I send you all so much love and tons of hugs!
XOXOXO
Cassandra

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