Going For The “Gold” In Your Love Life

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If you, like me, have been glued to the TV watching the opening ceremonies of the Olympics, and then the competitions themselves, perhaps you’re wondering how I’m going to use the Olympics to help you in your love life.

It’d be easy to use the metaphors and images of “work hard” “push yourself” “just do it.”

But that would be the complete OPPOSITE of everything I teach.

Doing ANYTHING to make a relationship happen – especially “pushing,” is the opposite of just “being,” receiving and responding, which I believe are the cornerstones for a woman who wants a great relationship.

So how does the amazing “work ethic” of being a world-class athlete work in love?

Let’s first look at some of the words we associate with the Olympics:

“Honor… push yourself… break records…go beyond limits…pressure…bear responsibility…win…beat…conquer…compete…”

These words have nothing to do with relating to a man, but they have everything to do with relating to yourself – to PARTS of yourself.

They have everything to do with the parts of ourselves that hold us BACK from getting what we want. They have everything to do with going past fear.

And for most of us, we think the biggest fear in our lives is that we’ll be alone. But it’s not.

The biggest fear for most of us is actually fear of GETTING CLOSE to a man.

It’s actually BELIEVING and putting our whole heart into the IDEA that we deserve and can actually HAVE what we want.

The limits we have to go beyond aren’t out THERE – they’re in our own brains. They’re limits we were taught as children, and they’re limits that society and our culture reinforce every single day.

Telling us who we are NOT is like…the JOB of our culture. We grew up often around people – in our families, school, society – who had lost dreams of their own or felt uncomfortable with their real successes, and either made us afraid of wanting success, or told us we couldn’t have it because of some flaw we have.

And this kind of thinking goes on and on in our brains every minute of every day.

It’s like a replay of the missed shot at the end of a game that haunts us forever – only we didn’t really even PLAY.

It’s the IDEA and FEAR that we’ll miss that shot that haunts us – and that fear is fed constantly by all the smaller missed shots in our lives that we’ve allowed to set limits for ourselves.

And it’s these INNER limits we have to push through, overcome, master, get beyond – no matter what kind of pressure or sense of responsibility for others comes at us from outside.

Just like the Olympic athletes.

The truth is – the whole idea of becoming an Olympian would seem impossible for most of us. A ridiculous dream. And yet we sit here watching real people live these dreams.

And then we watch the footage of how they trained and prepared themselves for this moment. And it seems impossible that we could ever put that much energy and passion into this. (And yes – they are, most of them, so young – and most of us see them as almost like our children instead of our peers – and yet, that “young person” with “big dreams” still lives inside us.)

So – while we’re watching the Olympics these two weeks, let’s pretend that we’re all running a marathon, all dashing for the finish line, all conquering the balance beam.

Only – for love, it’s not about the physical world or sports equipment or a race.

It’s about the intention to “go for the gold” even though our brains are trained to settle for the “lead.”

In these next posts, I’ll put together Tools to take you from wherever you are now in your love life to where you want to be – the “Gold” – in a feminine energy, “Being” way.

For now – visualize your “Gold” and I look forward to reading your experiences in comments here.

Love, Rori

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