Heal Your Heartbreak By January 1st! – Coach Teresa Clement

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by Teresa Clement

How you can heal your heartbreak by January 1 ((SPECIAL OFFER — 3 SPOTS LEFT))

The holidays are supposed to be a magical time: twinkling lights, cozy fires, delightful surprises, and a heightened appreciation for what matters most — our closest relationships.

Ironically, the holiday season is one of the TOP times of year when relationships go downhill.

Maybe it’s the extra pressure, or maybe all the festivities force us to notice what we previously managed to pretend wasn’t happening. Maybe it’s the winter solstice nudging us to let go of what’s not working. In any case, lottttsssss of breakups happen around the holidays.

It’s devastating (not to mention lonely and embarrassing). You had such beautiful, warm hopes for showing up together, bonding, and making special memories together… and now you’re going to the parties alone (if you can even manage to drag yourself there at all).

If you’re suffering from the pain of a heartbreak, I know how awful that feels going into the festive season.

Here’s the good news: now is the PERFECT TIME to recalibrate your vibe, raise your self esteem, and HEAL YOUR HEART by the end of the year.

I’ve had my heart broken more times than I care to count (and it seems like a high percentage of those have happened around the holidays).

So I’ve become a master at dealing — and healing.

Here are some of the top tips that have helped me flow through my grief and come out the other side much faster, with raised self esteem, stronger boundaries, and the wisdom to avoid the same mistakes again.

 I napped. A lot. Sleep is a huge relief from the relentless depredations of heartbreak.

 I refused to beat myself up for being “less productive” than usual. I decided to trust my body and spirit to heal in their own way and time. Of course I stuck with my basic responsibilities — like going to work, feeding myself, and taking care of my puppy — BUT I didn’t get mad at myself for not wanting to do projects and activities beyond the minimum.

 I worked WITH my monkey mind by catching myself in obsessive thinking and giving myself this gentle interruptive reminder: “I am here now.” Then I’d touch an object, or imagine the air touching my body, to become present with my physical surroundings in the moment. A few seconds is all the brain needs to let the pain lift momentarily. Of course it comes back, but we’re working with moments.

 I instituted a six-point “Self Love Regimen” that included specific commitments for how I would take extra special care of my body (nutrition, exercise, self pleasuring etc) AND my mind/emotions (tenderly supportive self talk, positive visioning, Riffing**). I incorporated these activities into my daily activities and stuck with them religiously. This was incredibly helpful in giving my mind a break from the repetitive, obsessive thoughts that were only causing me more misery.

 When I caught myself flinging curses at my ex (or the woman he’d betrayed me with), I found ways to use my words as blessings toward them instead. “Thank God for her, she took him away at the perfect time for me to open up to a better relationship.” “Thank God he went to her, now the pain of that relationship — which wasn’t working anyway — has a chance to heal.”

 I reminded myself that his betrayal was a reflection on him, not me. I reminded myself that inevitable heartbreak isn’t “just the way relationships are.” I am not cursed to always attract this. I chose him with the full knowledge that he wasn’t at my level vibrationally. I can make a different choice now.

 I noticed myself wanting to beat myself up for making this choice that led me to such a crushing heartbreak. Instead of trying to shut up that part of me, I showered love on it. I said “thank you for your passion and fierceness in wanting to defend me. I feel your pain and I’m so sorry. Please help me next time I feel tempted to make another bad choice in partners. I am ready to listen now.” My nasty internal critic calmed down and I moved on into a better-feeling moment.

 Instead of resisting my grief, fighting it, or trying to distract myself from feeling it — I honored it as a beautiful, tender, lovable aspect of myself. I spoke to my grief with compassion. I told it “thank you.”

 Sometimes, when I felt a pang (grief, despair, “unfair,” rage, “abandoned,” fear, guilt) — I imagined myself growing hugely tall, expanding my physical size to make room for the feeling. As I “grew” to accommodate the intensity, it started to feel good. This technique helped me quiet my mind enough to fall asleep at night.

 Other times, when I felt a pang of terrible feelings, I relabeled what I was feeling. Instead of “I’m feeling miserable,” I decided to view it differently. It’s such a miracle to be alive in human form on this planet, with the capacity to feel such an extraordinary range of intense emotions. So I decided, instead of labeling the feeling as “good” or “bad,” I would relabel it as the one emotion that encompasses all of it: LOVE. When it felt like a bomb was exploding inside my stomach — it felt like shrapnel was raking me from chest to pelvis — I would say “I’m feeling LOVE right now.” It’s totally possible to feel love and grief at the same time. Or love and anger. Even love and fear. (Fear never goes away entirely, but if I can focus on the love, then the fear won’t stop me. Love encompasses even fear.)

There are SO MANY TOOLS that can heal your heartbreak faster than you’d possibly believe, and open you up wide to let in love that’s bigger, grander, stronger, more intimate and joyful than anything you’ve known up until now.

You’ve tried doing this process on your own. How well has that worked for you?

Would it help to have someone holding your hand through this lonely and challenging time? Someone to hold you accountable for taking consistent action for yourself? Someone who helps you craft CUSTOMIZED tools that target your exact, particular needs? A compassionate guide who can show you the TRUE VISION of your immense capacity to give and receive love?

That’s me.

There are only THREE SPOTS LEFT in my holiday email coaching program. At $250, you can’t afford to miss this. (Unless you’d rather wait another month being heartbroken.)

Go here to apply: teresaclement.com/holiday-offer-2019

Love, Teresa

 

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