How Do I Feel Sexy Right Now – Even Though My Man Hasn’t Arrived Yet?

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I got this article from my friend Allana Pratt – The Sexy Mom Expert – and I thought it was terrific, so I asked if I could use it as a guest post answering the question:

How Do I Feel Sexy Right Now – Even Though My Man Hasn’t Arrived Yet?

Allana says:

While a nice warm sexy body is the best… a big part of what we like about having our partner is how it makes us feel to have them in our life. WE become alive knowing we have someone to see us, receive us, someone to give to, receive from… well, what I do when I’m single is remember that the Divine Masculine is always there, Existence itself is always there AND I play little games with myself to feel full from the inside out.

For example, I dance as if I was dancing for him, perhaps I close my eyes and imagine what he’s saying or doing and I truly enjoy the feelings of being adored and appreciated. It makes me feel powerful to know “he” thinks I’m gorgeous.

In reality, if I dance for an alter to my Beloved, I trust that wherever he is, he’s being fed by my dance energetically and I intend that it’s bringing him closer as I yearn to see his face and touch him for the first time.

Then as I make my way throughout the day, I go to the coffee shop feeling like I had just been made love to and that he’s shopping to make me dinner that very night. You see I get to believe whatever I want. I get to have whatever thoughts I want. And the result of acting as if I’m already full and in love

1. Makes me full and happy!
2. Dissolves neediness
3. Makes me look radiant and juicy and
4. is far more likely to attract a man that can fulfill me that much!

There is a time for being sad if your inner little girl needs some attention and there’s no need being totally alone if you’re single.

Please! Enjoy your girlfriends, your family, your kids and flirting!!!

Being at peace alone now also supports you for when you’re in the relationship and he needs some guy time or you crave some alone time… you’ve found your balance and are confident and sassy and alluring.

As I get more tips from Allana on this topic of feeling sensual and sexual and SEXY no matter what – I’ll ask to publish them for you (especially real-world tips on how to handle dating if you’re a single-mother).

You can find Allana at, and her new site

Try this, and let me know how it works for you…

Love, Rori

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  1.  #1Reshi on January 16, 2009 at 12:38 am

    Yet again, OH HELL YEAH.

    With zero men in the rotation, Reshi is happy to have the Divine Masculine to play with. This is something I’ve been using for months and to see it posted here feels like a wonderful affirmation of what I believe to be true.

    I almost feel like actual men can’t measure up, like they’re these lower-consciousness life forms and just simply can’t do the job. Goddess knows 99% of the men online are just operating on a completely different level from me. I’m looking for a sacred love connection, they’re looking for someone to go to baseball games and drink beer with, someone to look good on their arm and have their babies. Perhaps I need to cast a wider net…go into the terrifying world of NON-online dating, a world I’ve never really inhabited. Because the guy I’m looking for probably isn’t on He’s attending spiritual events, he’s already doing high-consciousness things on his own, he’s got the Divine Masculine thing going on within him. He’s out there living in the real world and I want to be there too.

  2.  #2heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 1:31 pm

    I like this post – thanks Allana, thanks Rori πŸ™‚

    I get that too, Reshi. The Divine Masculine feels good, like a big sigh of relief and an expanding heart.

    That’s amazing – an expanding heart, after my drawing of my cancelled bigger-than-me red heart .

    So much is coming up for me. I’ve been practising being a girl on here the last few posts, until my comment offering a website info I’d found useful i.e. being a boy – and it felt so BAD!! I felt scared after, I felt fake, disappointed, ashamed. It’s so good being a girl, I feel like I’ve found a secret, like precious delicate vase. I feel protective of this vase. I don’t want to GIVE at the moment.

    Just as well, since my man is going through his stuff around money (lack of work contracts, cuts). I’m amazed at how just focusing on my feelings and riffing are making it virtually IMPOSSIBLE for me to get into my old pattern of problem-solving. It’s helping me deal with my rage; I’m so TRIGGERED by his behaviour sometimes, I want to scream and yell. It feels so wierd not having that option, I feel clumsy with my words. But I CAN’T HELP but be myself, and when he talks about the work issue, I’m like “that feels so scary” or “it all feels so up in the air” … and he says “yes, it is, and…” and he’s saying how it is for HIM – instead of getting into his stuff – which is like a wall or a squashy thing.

    And I’ve been able to still express feelings about certain things in our relationship, at one time I’d have shut up about it cos’ of what he’s going through.

    Today he’s been great, he’s been supportive of me and a good man. Sometimes, though, I want to throw it all out and find my Lone She-Wolf again. F*ck now I’ve written that I’m not so sure…. this is a great experiment!!

    Some stuff is becoming second nature now – WOW!!

    All my life I’ve felt baffled seeing friends get help with things, all my life I’ve wondered what ingredient they have that I don’t, I kind of started to accept that’s just how it was. But now masculine men friends are turning up to support me and that feels so good at the moment.

  3.  #3Daria on January 16, 2009 at 2:10 pm

    I feel jealous of heartbeat ooops I almost wrote a different name for her that I connected her with (maybe erroneously) from before. Actually heartbeat I liked your post about the website because I found Rori at that same time, through the Christian carter interviews and I also found Marie Forleo’s stuff through him. So that was cool to see for me.

    I feel jealous of heartbeat that masculine men friends are turning up to support her. Actually what’s weird is that Random men friends I don’t usually talk to or hang out with in awhile are calling me to ask me how I am or ask me to hang out… yay… I feel grateful for their attention and I feel curious

    I WANT some men to turn up and support me. Really support me so that I feel that my life is easy breezy and I am just a princess. I remember I had started to manifest this in the past before I really practiced this stuff and just imagined men giving me money and attention so that all I would have to do is ask and everything in my life would be taken care of, including gas for my car and food. And I would cook food for them and bring it out for the whole neighborhood and be beautiful and sweet and loved. Hehe. I didn’t totally have that come about actually. It was a nice fantasy though. I am still willing to accept it and create it and mold it and love it.

    I feel like smiling.

  4.  #4heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 2:33 pm

    Ah gosh I feel triggered – a ball of reactions swirling, different coloured strands in my tummy, my breathing tight, jelly-feeling smiles, body wanting to lean forward…

    I’m reacting to Daria’s expression of jealousy (this is good, this is an opportunity for me to deal with this old stuff of mine – deep breath – stay with me)… feel like i’m pulling a coat around me (I don’t want to). no no I’m unworthy, no no I’m a nice person, I want to backtrack, I want to say ah now it’s not all that good – be my friend won’t you?? I want to big you up.

    Sigh, relaxing, sinking in my whole torso… deep breath… a feeling of growing back into myself. Ahhh that feels better, like the lights turned up again!

    Daria – Reading how your men friends are turning up and how we both found Rori and Marie on the same path feels amazing! I’m scared I come across more ‘together’ than I am. I feel like crying.

  5.  #5heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 2:36 pm

    Ah I forgot, yes I did have a different name. I changed it cos’ my old name sounded cute masculine, and also in case anyone I know read it. I’m glad I’m not alone in feeling anxious about people I know reading my comments – I even worry my man would read them lol!!

  6.  #6heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 2:51 pm

    Girl version of my last comment – I’m feeling puzzled and anxious. I felt my chest tighten when Daria mentioned nearly calling me by another name she connected me with. I felt wierd and sad a couple of weeks ago when TWO people called me by the WRONG name!! I’m interested if there is something for me to learn about myself here.

  7.  #7Daria on January 16, 2009 at 2:55 pm

    Oh heartbeat I felt like hugging you so Tight when I read your post! Of course I want to be your friend! AWWWWW…

    I also feel like explaining… that the jealousy thing is all about me… and that feels not so good to say… it feels kinda thinky… I feel crinkled forehead and I feel confused

    I feel weird confused face like a kid and because I love that look that suddenly melted on it’s own into smiling and giggling…

  8.  #8heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    Aw Daria – and my trigger is all about me! This feels great, riffing together! I’m smiling and feeling shy and kind of warm and bobbing around like a happy bunny πŸ™‚ I feel so young, a lttle girl… I hug my little girl, I see Daria hugging Daria. I want to share my bunny tea-set πŸ™‚ I feel playful, I don’t feel like being a goddess right now.

  9.  #9Daria on January 16, 2009 at 3:20 pm

    Hehe I feel like goddesses are playful when they want to like sirens or fairies… that feels like smiling

    you don’t have to be a goddess if you don’t want feel like it hehehe… i still see you as one!! hehehehe

  10.  #10heartbeat on January 16, 2009 at 3:26 pm

    Oh I love ‘fairies’! Yes that feels right – thank you Daria πŸ™‚

  11.  #11Ann on January 16, 2009 at 7:56 pm

    Daria and heartbeat I feel jeolous of both of you. Not the green eyed monster “how dare you have that instead of me jeolousy”. I feel not sure jeolous is even the word maybe envy is better. I want men to support, protect, adore me.

    I feel myself opening up to recieve what I want. I feel happy that you’re finding support from men. Releashing “sigh” I feel….I’m not all together but I’m getting there one tiny baby step at a time.

    Hugs ladies

  12.  #12alias girl on January 16, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    i feel desire to join in on hug and feel desire to have someone share their bunny teaset with me.

    i feel uninvited. i feel self triggered. omg. all those old feelings of i don’t belong. i am not part of. i am too freaky weird to join in. i feel toxic green. i feel shame. i feel sad. i feel like i just ruined the party and caused a spectacle and sucked up all the air and brought attention to myself. ugh. wow. gross. i love my self judgment. i love my excluding myself before anyone has a chance to reject me. i love my shame i want to keep secret and delete this comment so no one knows. i love this baby step of thawing. i feel like a nuisance. i feel like human relations are so delicate and it annoys me. where’s the teflon. ? but who wants teflon? i’ve met and been teflon before. a bit unsatisfying. i feel it is ok to accept myself. it is ok. i feel really unclothed. wrong word. i feel really vulnerable sharing this comment ack but i am going to do it. i feel brave and damn the consequences.

  13.  #13Tracy on January 16, 2009 at 9:25 pm

    i feel the same way about the masculine energy u mentioned……it reminded me of how i always seem to be giving so much information always trying to get ahead of others and in return i don’t receive any support and that always makes me feel upset…..
    I am the fist born and i’ve always taken care of my siblings and i feel that it affected how i relate to others because i am always giving information advice m time……….it feels tiring and i am triggered by it because i feel i should relax and let others take over for a change….
    i want to feel taken care of and loved and supported.i want to feel at ease…
    I am really going to practise the leaning back doing more of listening u know really listening to what others are saying and not just talking all the time,just to feel their presence and how their ideas and conversations make me feel…………
    i am feeling triggered and happy just thinking about it and feeling blessed.thank you all ladies…

  14.  #14Ann on January 16, 2009 at 10:07 pm

    Tracy, I’m also the first born. And I feel connected to what you just posted. That’s me

  15.  #15Reshi on January 17, 2009 at 12:38 am

    I’m the first born too but I never took care of my siblings…I beat them up πŸ™ I guess in some ways, I was more big brother than big sister πŸ˜‰

  16.  #16heartbeat on January 17, 2009 at 12:53 am

    Oh I feel so excited! There are plenty of cups and saucers in my bunny teaset – I’d love you to join in, Alias Girl! I’m doing a twirly whirly dance that you asked. I feel good that you want to join in, a kind of teary good πŸ™‚

    Ann, Tracy & Reshi – I’m a firstborn too. Looking after others scares me but I’ve always done it, realise I never noticed my scared cos’ I got praise for being clever and it gave me power in my family. Sometimes I wasn’t so nice either, I feel bad about writing that but I’ve talked about it with my sister.

    I feel newly connected to you all, feels like we not only sharing our stuff around men but sharing our feelings about being on this island of sirens. Sometimes I’ve felt lleft out too, my girl voice feels so quiet. When I stopped being a boy there was this big HOLE, this silence, I felt uncertain.

    Does anyone have any cake?? πŸ˜‰

  17.  #17alias girl on January 17, 2009 at 2:54 am

    I’LL BRING CAKE!!!!! i feel so excited (and a little wary) to be included! hah! there’s enough cake for everyone. who wants cake?!!

  18.  #18heartbeat on January 17, 2009 at 3:19 am

    I want cake!! Yay!! THANK YOU Alias Girl πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ And cream. Yum Yum!

    Ahhhhhhh…… πŸ™‚

    Love to everyone for the weekend xxxx

  19.  #19Daria on January 17, 2009 at 12:18 pm

    Hehe thanks you guys I love the cake and the teaset. I feel wonderful to join the party. I would NEVER have or at least I NEVER have had a tea party before. I was always into beating kids up like Reshi… for some reason this really delights me… Reshi I loved how you shared that you used to do that… it makes me feel more “normal.” I always assumed that it meant I was a boy. Or maybe not always. Just at some point. Maybe when I moved to the US. I got culture shocked for being a girl and wanting to beat kids up. Hahaha… This feels hilarious for me. I feel very proud of being a fighter you see… I am still wondering how that and my epic huge war battle warrior princess fantasies fit in with my openhearted compassionate kind Godess self.

    I guess we all have different sides. And Godesses can of course be very fighty and destructive and set everything on fire if they want to. And they can also make everything bloom and have roses opening and dew on flowers and baby godesses inside them. When do you use which? What do I do with my warrior Goddess that likes to be friends with men. She feels like the man that she likes will abandon her for a ‘softer’ Goddess. Except she is soft too. So she feels confused. She tries to be soft seeming and that makes her feel confused.

    I read this book called Alanna: The First Adventure (lol I feel a little embarassed sharing this, in fact a lot lol I feel my cheeks turning red) by Tamora Pierce. It is about a girl in a magic kingdom that wants to be a knight. So she pretends to be a boy and goes to the training camp. Well anyway she is good and all that good stuff. So she is discovered by the prince and they become lovers and she falls in love. Check on step one. Check on step two. Then he leaves her (although he continues to try to have sex with her) because he has to get married to the queen chosen for him, who is more girly, although not really frilly either. Ummm… CHECK 3!!!!! I FEEL SO ANGRY! Anyway the GOOD part of the story to the credit of the story is that Alanna does get over him and marry the ruler of thieves who is really caring and supportive of her. (no Check here) Except I feel MAD. I WANT HER TO MARRY THE PRINCE. WTF!!!! I don’t want the second rate relationship. I want her to wint the first. I want ME to win the first. I’ve been at this since I was six and the little boy I liked told me he liked a girl in his class named ohyeah Corina. I really like that name too because obviously it must make men like you (I feel bitter here) Anyway Corina did not go around beating up other kids in the neighborhood or maybe even climbing trees (like ahem me) she wore dresses and had long hair. So woe is me. So began my overfunctioning as I chased him around trying to kiss him. I have STILL not really gotten over that and just did it again over the past 5 years.

  20.  #20Daria on January 17, 2009 at 12:21 pm

    Ok well Alanna also continues to be the kings “best champion” and friend. Which I have tried ( Check step 5 without step 4 – probably a problem). Except I’ve failed because I am still desperately wanting the prince on some level. So working on step 4. Finding the good relationship. I GUESS. I still THINK that She should get the Prince. DAMMIT.

  21.  #21Tracy on January 17, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Alias g,Hear beat,Reshi
    this is interesting….i’ve always been praised for being responsible,and bright and always taking care of others and my mum…can you imagine every single time i am about to say i feel i always write i think first….thats how much masculine energy i have….i feel i’ve only recently started appreciating my feminine side………and appreciating myself…i feel blessed that all you ladies can relate to that…..Yay………..another light bulb…..
    This new me feels great……….new and inspiring……..thanks rori…….stil working on the tools!
    i feel being the first born instills a sense of responsibility that made me disregard my feminine self and focus more on the boy side in order to have things done…………..i feel relieved to have identified that….

  22.  #22Tracy on January 17, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    Daria…………i Love the story u just posted…….hilarious and lovely………………i can really relate to it!
    i feel the man she ended up with eventually made her happier because he claimed her……..he wanted her………and she felt good being with him then he was the one for her……..what do u think?

  23.  #23Daria on January 17, 2009 at 12:37 pm

    Yes I think so too Tracy… Sigh… I feel defeeated. However I still want to hold on AND RARRGHT I WANT HER TO BE WITH THE PRINCE. So how do I deal with this? Lol… I feel amused and yet hopeful… I would like this healed Once and For All… oooh I would LOVE the Once and For All part…

  24.  #24Daria on January 17, 2009 at 12:40 pm

    Let go Daria… No I WONT… I want HIM… lol… ok… I feel amused… that’s ok Honey we can’t afford him… Absolute Fury… hehehe…. I feel like laughing

  25.  #25Ann on January 17, 2009 at 4:45 pm

    I feel so connected to you ladies. Sometimes I feel I find words put to my feelings here. Being the first born it often fall on my shoulders to take care of everyone else. Oftentimes what I did just wasn’t good enough. I was a tomboy growing up. I climbed trees, got in fights alot of times with boys and won. I took up my brothers and sisters fights if bigger kids were picking on them. I just realized I was the oldest son so to speak. I could beat all my brothers and sisters up(there are 6 of us) even my brother who is just a couple of years younger that me. I didn’t have time to be a girl. I didn’t get to embrace my feminity, I feel sad about that. I’m trying to embrace my girl better but I was always the strong one. I left home at 16 years old. I have just recently learnt it’s ok to let some people see me cry. That’s it ok not to be the tough girl. It’s ok to let someone else take care of me. I’m trying to ask for more of what I want.

    I feel a knot in my stomach. I feel tears in the back of my eyes. I feel like I’ve said enough for now.

    May I have a piece of cake?

    My little girl feels like she wants to scream, damn ISP leave me connected let me speak ughhhhh.

  26.  #26alias girl on January 17, 2009 at 7:08 pm

    YES OF COURSE! CAKE FOR ANN!!! CAKE FOR ANYONE WHO WANTS CAKE.!!! there is more than enough cake and imagine it is your favorite kind. each slice is different, custom baked for the eater! IT IS MAGIC CAKE! xoxo!

    i feel like a thousand year old tree today. i can not move. partly bc i am studying this new material on manifestation process and it takes energy in that school work kind of way. not my fav thing. but i really want to master (MASTER!) manifesting so i can have this incredible life.

    but i feel like a stone statue. maybe i will go exercise.

    i feel love for you women/godesses and it is getting a little easier to say but i still feel a little bit uncomfortable.i feel confused why that is really. i feel embarrassed. i always feel imbarrassed when i am not perfect.

    i was actually the baby not the first born. a little bit favored by one parent (ignored by the other) so i am kind of childlike and only really like to have fun. i feel embarrassed again. i can see why intimate relationships are a challenge for me. true things about myself cause me to feel embarrassed bc i imagine other people judging my truth. i want to be impervious to judgment and a lover of truth.

    ugh i feel rgh and cementlike.

  27.  #27Cassandra on January 19, 2009 at 11:44 am

    I love you guys and these beautiful posts above….AG….I can totally relate to something that you wrote and when I read it – it brought tears to my eyes… said “i love my excluding myself before anyone has a chance to reject me.” I feel SO Like this even right now. I feel like I am on the outside looking in…that I don’t belong because I am not getting it as quick as everyone else or as quick as I should…I want to belong somewhere…anywhere…..I feel that I don’t even belong here at home. My inner little girl with the winnie the pooh dress abnd her favorite blue shiny shoes so desperately wants to be at the tea party and to have you all WANT me there as much as I want to be there. Can we say triggers? I too am the oldest but never played the role…my only sister 11 months younger than I am still hates me because I got more attention than she did…i am not better than anyone but I was quite sick when I was younger and you guys know I have had a ton of health issues to deal with that are more a thorn in my side than life stealers but still as sick child you do get more attention but not because you want it…wtrong kind of attention….my parents first question is always still….are you ok? I hate it. I wante do to hide as a child and get the right kind of attention not the only because she’s sick kind. i never got invited to a tea party..ever. I want to be at this one but I want to be there because you guys want me there not jsut cause I want to be there..i want to be wanted and loved and I feel so embarassed about telling you all that but I also feel that this is the ONLY place in my life that I can go and feel safe. I will bring another cake if it is needed….I will make my Grandma’s best carrot cake from scratch. I feel like once again I am saying – even thoug I DO WANT TO MAKE IT – that in order to be accepted that I have to DO something or BRING something…I am so not talking about you guys here and i hope you all know that. I want so much to belong here at home just for being me. AG…I don’t judge you…..I feel so close to you like I can relate so much to you…I want to belong but then I also want to hide in case I am rejected. I feel enbarassed feeling like this but I do. Let me know about the cake ok?

  28.  #28heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 12:45 pm

    I feel so excited to read all your comments again I can hardly breathe!

    I’ve always mostly given rather than received, but then I never knew if the giving was wanted or not, or if I was valued for myself or what I was giving – so it feels like a real GIFT for Cassandra to WANT to join in the tea party too and to SAY it! And Oh carrot cake mmmm – YES PLEASE!!

    I feel shy all of a sudden.

  29.  #29heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 12:59 pm

    I feel like a warrior woman sometimes, it’s like another aspect of my Lone She-Wolf wanting to feel the cool air and the strength of her body. I feel a quickening in my muscles, I want to run and get out on the water and feel the power of the air.

    Air…breath…movement… I can feel myself drawn outwards again. Suddenly I think of air as masculine and I’m a warrior sailor woman being filled by it, Air is feeding me, breathing life and energy and power back into my body and into my emotions.

  30.  #30Cassandra on January 19, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    Heartbeat…..You are so special to me and to this blog! Your post made me feel so welcome and so wanted and so loved. thank you. I felt so embarassed feeling what I do and then writing it – I guess it made it more real to me kind of like making something and then it is finished – it becomes more real when it is finished and realized. Like you, I have always felt better giving and am not all that comfortable receiving but on the other hand I get so much JOY out of giving to those that I love and helping people whether I know them or not…that bring me immeasurable joy. Of course it is nice to receive but I am not all that comfortable receiving. I know that growing up there was ALWAYS a price to be paid for anything/ everything that my Mom did and I know that it was not on purpose on her part…she did the best she could with what she had to work with at the time but it created a sense of guilt in both my sister and I to receive much of anything in life no matter who it is from….perhaps that plays into me tolerating some of the things that C has done?? I am working on that. So I totally know what you mean about the value being YOU for YOU or for what ever it is that you were giving. I can tell you from MY HEART that your value is totally on YOU for who and how YOU are….YOU are a gift and I am so thankful that you are here….whether you feel like giving something or not. I think that just by being here you are giving a gift! πŸ™‚ I will still make you that carrot cake though!! πŸ™‚ I could also totally relate to your last post. Charles has a harley and he and his family tease me becasue I love to ride more than he does and am always playfully asking him to take me riding. I love it because like Linda had said in another post…I feel so connected to him without having to say a word….I am totally trusting him to keep me safe and having so much fun being with him and not saying anything….we get to just BE together and enjoy and then there is that feeling of complete freedom when you are riding….like your Lone She-Wolf getting out on the water….I love that and that I got to experience all of that with Charles. I hope that I will get to experience that with him again and again and again. So often I wonder if I have gone riding with him for the last time…even though he has not said that at all as a matter of fact he even said this weekend that he loves me and he has not said that in a long time unless I asked him so this is coming from me not him. It makes me so sad to think about that….like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop. In any case…thank you for your love and for making me feel so wanted…that means alot to me! I have to go make that cake!! πŸ™‚

  31.  #31heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 3:13 pm

    Wow thank you Cassandra πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ I’m jumping up and down for that carrot cake! My tummy feels warm and full already. I feel longing for your gift of that home-made cake, and a strange fizzy stillness inside that says “are you sure? are you sure that cake is for me?” and now I’m smiling and feeling filled with love and joy.

    I’m just closing my eyes and staying in my feelings for a while; and picturing all of you in this beautiful tea-party. It feels so gentle and nurturing, I can see soft muted colours and deeper shades.

  32.  #32heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 3:14 pm

    I feel so much grief and sadness for the girl I was.

  33.  #33Cassandra on January 19, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    Heartbeat….it is for you Love! I feel honored to be a part of this tea party and this blog..this community of such amazing, loving, wonderful, compassionate, HUGE hearted Godesses. I feel so happy to be wanted…thank you. I love you.

  34.  #34heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    Cassandra when I read your comments I feel so much openness and energy and bubbliness – you really are unique and special. I feel like wrapping you up in my arms.

    I’m just basking in the warmth. I feel your lovingness and I also feel the familiar tightening in my body, the automatic reaction in me that wants to push it away. I feel alarmed writing that cos it’s not about YOU, it’s my learned reaction. I feel vulnerable.

    I just want to stay right here and feel that tightness melt away. I’m sending love to you too! Those three words – hold such power for me. I don’t say them easily, I feel embarrassed… so for now my button-step is being here totally, sending out love to you (and to all of you healing together/alongside – I’m getting a buzz off ‘alongside’).

  35.  #35Cassandra on January 19, 2009 at 5:15 pm

    Thank you Heartbeat. I am so glad that you stayed right there….feeling what you feel and allowing it to drench you completely in those feelings like standing under a waterfall. Thank you so much for your compliments….sometimes I wonder if people think I am serious but I really am an open book and I really do say how I feel and tell people how I feel about things and about them. I have been in too many situations where when I left my house that morning I had something happen that very well could have been the end for me literally so I am totally and completely about telling those that I care about and love and that I do care about them and I do love them because you never know what is going to happen and – I don’t mean this in a negative vain at all – if it may be the last time that you get to tell them that. I am all about letting those that I love know how I feel and apopreciate them…not only that but this world is so filled with negatives and criticism and people are so not used to someone telling them something good. I think that sometimes maybe some people don’t think i am serious…but I am…totally and I do mean it with all of my heart. I so loved it when you said that you wished that you could wrap me up in your arms…..that touched my heart. You also have a HUGE and beautiful heart and you are truly such a gift here and to me personally. I am so thankful that you allow us to be a part of your journey and process and allow us to be there for you as well. Just enjoy your evening…stay right where you are..fell that tightness and love it in every way and enjoy YOU and all of the wonderful things that you are! I do love you!!

  36.  #36heartbeat on January 19, 2009 at 6:17 pm

    I feel a flappy thing going on in my eyelashes (wtf?!)… I feel my lips smiling and my eyes moving from side to side. My legs feel so straight and my arms tense at the top and warm from my elbow to my wrists, and my hands are doin that flappy thing too! Damn I feel like a BABY… and it feels GOOD and UNCOMFORTABLE… at the same time!

    I want to squeal with joy!!!

    and I feel ashamed… I feel like I’m holding myself IN in my pelvis.. ugh… I’m scared as to where this is leading… my head wants to analyse, find a reason. OK stay with it, stay with it… let it pass, relax breathe out out out… ahh feel whole body expanding again… WOW I need never get stuck in that feeling again!!! Oh Yeah!

    Hi fives all round! I’m shakin it all out like a shaggy wet dog drying herself without a care in the world.. joyous! “Water water everywhere, who it splashes – I don’t care!”

    Thank you Cassandra for your waterfall of love. I LOVE YOU TOO!!! XXXXXXXXXXXX

  37.  #37alias girl on January 20, 2009 at 7:50 pm

    awwww. i can’t belive i missed all that love flying around! sometimes i don’t check the back posts. but here you were having a little party. speaking of.

    OF COURSE CASSANDRA AT THE TEA PARTY! YES OF COURSE! you needn’t bring anything but your fabulous goddess self!

  38.  #38Femininewoman on March 12, 2013 at 6:39 pm

    I love this article. I am going to try it.