Love Alchemy

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attentionWhat is Alchemy?

Alchemy is when one thing turns into another.

Water turns into ice.

Water turns to steam.

It changes.

Its molecular makeup is the same, but something gets added: heat, cold…and it changes its form. It can happen very, very quickly.

Same thing with a recipe.

You add something and all of a sudden it’s got a different name. It’s a different dish. It’s alchemy.

Same thing happens with us.

We’re “stuck” the way we think we are, in the situation we think we’re stuck in, and then all of a sudden something happens.

Something gets added: an awareness, a perception, a new way of seeing something, a new way of looking at something, a new way of speaking.

Bingo. The whole recipe changes. You change. Your vibe changes.

Everything changes.

What’s going on for you in this moment can change in the next.

So – if we’re feeling “stuck” – what’s keeping us in this “stuck”- feeling place – is it fear?

For me, it’s not the fear itself.

It’s the running away from the fear that’s keeping us from what we need and holding us back. The running away.

Let’s go back to the core thought of all of my work – the masculine/feminine, boy/girl stuff.

This “play” of boy, “doing” energy, and girl “just being” energy.

The question we all are looking or an answer to, at so many moments, is “When do I “do” which?”

For now, let’s look at the theme of Alchemy, of looking at the “organic” process Alchemy takes through your feminine energy. Where organic means you just sort of arrive at things.

Where – If a man is not doing his job for you, instead of battering yourself and your brain trying to figure out what you should be doing, you are now going to be organically being led to make decisions and say things that actually will serve you better than anything else, than anything anybody could tell you, than anything in a book you could read.

I want you to organically begin to trust yourself. Total trust in you.

I trust you. I love you.

I know that what you’re doing for yourself is top drawer.

What I want us to stop doing is the beating up of ourselves.

Then, I want us to start embracing our fear and our rage and our anger, and start organically moving towards the life we want rather than feeling stuck in the one we may be in at the moment.

Top thing – a major problem for all of us – is urgency. A sense of urgency and a sense of “attack.”

 

Here’s my video on what you can “do” when those feelings and sensations come up for you:

Urgency happens when your boy energy, your inner knight in shining armor, is going unemployed.

Meaning, you’re using your boy energy to try and make a relationship work rather than using it to save the world.

Love, Rori

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46 Comments

  1.  #1Femininewoman on April 11, 2016 at 7:35 am

    This feels good to read “I want you to organically begin to trust yourself. Total trust in you.”



  2.  #2Leela on April 11, 2016 at 12:09 pm

    I so, so needed this today. I’ve been feeling “attacked” and in urgency all day today. A man I’m dating triggered me last night, I couldn’t sleep easily. He touched a part of me I don’t like and I felt like running away. It was while we were texting. The conversation got too deep and heavy for me. He wants to know too much and I haven’t worked on that part of myself yet. I keep delaying it. I know it’s a message. I can sense that he’s got a lot of messages for me and it feels scary. I want to run away from him, he is trying to get too close. I know the whole work is about opening up and letting him in but it still feels frightening. I even feel angry at him for liking the parts of me I hate. I am seeing 2 other men this week and I will practice opening up more with them. And yes, my masculine energy is not very invested in me. Need to work on that as well.



  3.  #3Millie on April 11, 2016 at 7:09 pm

    Rori–
    I love seeing and hearing your voice on the video! It feels more intimate and like you are speaking directly to me. I would love to see more blog videos in the future!!



  4.  #4Millie on April 11, 2016 at 7:27 pm

    I wanted to share something interesting! On the previous post I talked about a man who I gave my phone number to via online dating. What interested me about him in the first place was how passionate, communicative, and thoughtful his messages were…so I felt good giving my number out. After we chatted a bit he had begun sending me naked pictures of himself (luckily covering his manhood–I don’t want to see that before I meet someone!!) and I immediately told him that I didn’t feel comfortable with sending pictures of myself before meeting. He accepted that and did not ask me to, but continued to send pictures of himself seeking my approval! I withdrew and let him know I felt uncomfortable. He apologized and said that he was being playful and wanted to compete with the other men that are messaging me. This makes complete sense to me now, why he was doing it. He asked what I wanted, how he could make me happy, because he felt like he couldn’t read me. I felt like I was being very direct, so it was frustrating to hear that. I just repeated what I had been saying, that I appreciated his message, but felt uncomfortable with the pictures being sent so soon and I’m not sure we are a match..that I feel overwhelmed. He said he still wanted to meet me and understood and overall sent a very sweet reply asking if there is anything he can do to help and to thank me for communicating with him. I began to get a sense of this man’s masculinity… extremely masculine but also seeking my validation of his physicality, which I really didn’t give because I haven’t even met him yet!! Anyway I did write him this morning and he was very surprised I responded to him and said he really likes me. I felt surprised at that as well and he said
    “Yes, I really like you. You are so genuine and honest and vulnerable. And really cute. I want to protect you and pleasure you all day!” I have to say that felt pretty awesome to read! I felt very seen after he said that!!! I definitely felt like this beautiful siren that this big man wanted to hold in his arms and kiss and take care of. I kinda liked that visual!!! One thing though, this guy is middle eastern and I feel a bit scared of how domineering some middle eastern men can be… I don’t mean to sound offensive to anyone on here that is a part of middle eastern culture, I respect it very much, but I was not raised in a household where the father is dominant. My mother let her masculine side show a lot. As much as I want to be the feminine partner, I can also see that I put walls up with men (of any culture) because I fear THEY will cross my boundaries even after I expressed them. Does that make sense?
    I do think he is worth meeting at least at this point and getting a feel for it though!



  5.  #5Indigo on April 12, 2016 at 2:39 am

    Millie,

    Be careful.



  6.  #6April Rose on April 12, 2016 at 2:49 am

    Yes Millie,

    I totally get what you are saying. I don’t know if my fear is exactly the same as yours – it’s fear that a man (or any person) could transgress my person, or violate me in some way.

    Fear around boundaries comes because I fear I won’t hold to them and to myself be true.

    I can do a lot to soothe that fear by first being REALLY clear what my boundaries are. I really loved the clarity raised in the previous post by Zara and by Indigo. And I want to state a boundary as a result, that says I will not open my heart and body to a man who is not moving towards my emotional needs.

    That would be a boundary.

    The only person who could transgress that boundary would be me. If, for example (and his is where my fear of my own weakness comes in) I allow a man in for other reasons – I am physically attracted to him, or I really wish he was ‘the one’, or I’m giving him a chance or hoping for the best – then I have disregarded my own boundaries. This can feel bad. However, the best thing is to be aware of this self-transgression and forgive myself quickly.

    So, Millie. Being aware of your own decisions about who you allow to enter your precious goddess space, well that helps to dissipate this fear.

    Because you know you will forgive yourself, and press the re-set button if you break your own promises!



  7.  #7April Rose on April 12, 2016 at 2:54 am

    Having said that, there is also the healthy fear that someone is not out for your best interests at all.

    I don’t think it has anything to do with culture – maybe we can do a quick survey (do men from all cultures send out naked pics?) – but this sending of nude photos to a woman rings alarm bells for me.

    It doesn’t seem ‘gentlemanly’.
    I don’t believe the reasons he gave you, Millie.
    To stand out from other man he should surely be thinking about treating a woman really, really well. And putting that forward instead.



  8.  #8April Rose on April 12, 2016 at 2:57 am

    I have several happily married friends who met each other online.

    I cannot imagine that any of them sent out naked photos as part of the initial contact with each other…



  9.  #9Heather Belle Murphy on April 12, 2016 at 3:19 am

    Hi Millie – I hope I’m not giving unsolicited advice… & feel free to ignore the following – remember it is part of the push me – pull you man game he plays to overwhelm your boundaries. Be yourself and be in your own power. If he is moving too fast – tell him and back off and don’t be pushed into big deep disclosure. Online /texting relationships are moving too fast… too soon… A new client of mine – pretty and smart kept finding herself in sexual relationships too fast & she would get sucked into revealing too much. Slow down, ground and honour yourself, back off from big deep disclosure, have ‘doing’ dates – walks and museums etc so you can just be – not long intimate times and write your list of 100 things you want in him and the relationship so you can stay grounded in what you want. Love-light & Blessings Heather Belle



  10.  #10Indigo on April 12, 2016 at 3:52 am

    April Rose 8,

    I too know of numerous happily coupled up couples who met online, and I myself have had a few happy relationships with guys I met online, including the one I’m in now. All started with the man showing the woman the utmost respect and courtesy…



  11.  #11ruth on April 12, 2016 at 4:18 am

    Hello
    Millie, Im no prude, but for me, a man sending naked pictures without being in a s*xual relationship with me, well, that would have me running for the hills. I would find this a huge turn off and extremely disrespectful.
    I feel very uneasy for you reading about what he said, and would echo Indigo. Be careful sweet siren



  12.  #12Victoria on April 12, 2016 at 4:42 am

    Millie,
    I too had a “red flag feeling” when I read about him sending you too many pictures, even when you said they were not welcome. Also, his words that he wants to “pleasure you all day” have too much of a se*ual flavor for my taste. Just my two cents.



  13.  #13Emerson on April 12, 2016 at 7:55 am

    Rori,
    first of all, you look beautiful!
    Ahh…I love this post..interestingly enough I was listening to a talk radio show and the topic of Alchemy came up just a few days ago!!There’s definitely a message for me here ….. 🙂

    I really like this:
    “If a man is not doing his job for you, instead of battering yourself and your brain trying to figure out what you should be doing, you are now going to be organically being led to make decisions and say things that actually will serve you better than anything else, than anything anybody could tell you, than anything in a book you could read”

    I’m moving more toward this and also catching myself when i have “urgency”….and letting the feeling pass…

    I have a new CD that is younger than me…by 14 years…and we really like each other…I’m not sure where it will lead but I am remaining open…
    Rori and sirens what do you think about this age difference!!!!??? He’s very mature for his age and very very sweet…I really like him…
    Feeling excited…



  14.  #14Indigo on April 12, 2016 at 8:29 am

    Emerson,

    I think it’s wonderful that you are being open to different types of men.

    If you are interested, Cherry Norris has plenty to say about older women dating younger men and she is very supportive of it.

    Personally I think your ages are no one’s business but yours, and that age in so many cases is just a number, and if the two of you like each other, go for it! I would just offer the caution that if he’s in his twenties and you are looking to settle down he may not be ready for that yet.



  15.  #15Femininewoman on April 12, 2016 at 9:34 am

    Millie any stranger would be freaked out with getting naked pictures. Remember some guys also tend to tell you what they think you want to hear. At least he heard you and changed his tune a bit. At the end of the day your intuition is what will serve you the best. What is it telling you? How do you feel about the interaction so far? And do you think your picker has been off?

    In the event you choose to go out with this guy remember all this before you do. In your shoes, I wouldn’t go out alone with him. It would have to be a double date and if I decided to date him further it would always have to be in public for a while. Reality is you don’t him and people have had unpleasant experiences from contacts on dating sites. It might be even best to reach out to a male dating coach to see what he would say based on male behavioral patterns.



  16.  #16Azure Blu on April 12, 2016 at 10:18 am

    Millie,
    I can see why you would be excited by his enthusiasm…
    I too love it when a man is enthusiastic…

    BUT… you have set up some new boundaries to keep online dating a better experience for YOU…

    I have been online dating for Many years…
    I have ONLY met NICE men…
    a few years back…
    i few men who had some mental challenges contacted me…
    I spoke to them on the phone before we met…
    and something seemed off… but my “man picker” still wasn’t what I needed it to be…
    and when we met… it was very obvious there were some issues they were struggling with…
    BUT
    they had jobs, they even had ex’s and children…
    Not sure why these men don’t mention on their profile about their challenges… as I am sure there are women who have the same challenges
    that would LOVE to meet someone with the same.

    I ended up changing my profile – again- what I am looking for… being MORE clear – and more feminine.
    and –
    I also started getting better at realizing when there was a problem before we ever met…

    Anyway… what I am saying is….
    You have laid out some boundaries for you, this time,
    in online dating… one of them might be…
    When man sends “almost nude” photos
    JUST LET HIM GO!
    and I have found that putting up BETTER pictures of ME changed the caliber of men!
    and I tweaked my profile often… based on who was contacting me (or who WASNT)
    Evan Marc Katz has VERY good information available on his sight that encourages you to keep going with online dating… how often you need to be online…
    what – when- and where… check it out…
    IF you want this to work… YOU have to Work it!!
    also some great google info on writing a GREAT online profile… which totally changed the caliber of men that were contacting me… I was using POF this last time!



  17.  #17Azure Blu on April 12, 2016 at 10:35 am

    I am Sorry for clogging the blogusphere…
    I just had to share this one last thought…
    Not sure who wrote this///
    probably Rori:

    “Let Him Lead and Have the Strength to Follow…

    “In the moment, it can often feel so very weak—
    to let HIM lead.
    
It really IS a choice though.

    We forget that WE could simply NOT dance at all.

    Technically, we make that choice TO dance,
    
to TAKE his hand,
    
to TRUST,

    from the moment when we very first commit to our men
    and every day after that.

    I do believe CHOOSING to follow

    does take as much strength
    as taking the lead.

    Rori’s “vulnerability equals strength” started repeating in my head
    as I watched this scene.

    It takes OUR COURAGE
    because we have to actually trust ourselves—

    we have to LOVE ourselves.
    
I know without a doubt that the ability to TRUST
    is DIRECTLY related to the love I have for MYSELF.

    We have to know that WE are amazing

    and beautiful

    and fantastic

    and HIM leading doesn’t take anything away
    
from that beauty.
    
It actually ADDS to it.

    The fact that WE CHOOSE to be vulnerable

    and let him “take us on a journey”

    makes HIM absolutely certain

    that WE are the ONLY GIRL in the room
    that HE will EVER WANT TO DANCE WITH.”



  18.  #18Femininewoman on April 12, 2016 at 10:48 am

    Millie that was a very powerful message from Azure right there. I think bringing it to you if I were wearing your shoe I’d ask myself “what is it about me that is attracting a man who’d want to send such a picture”. Not to blame yourself in any way but to take a closer look at what you are putting out there to see if you a representing yourself the way you really wish to. As a matter of fact reading Azure’s words had me wondering what would happen if you experimented with changing every so often without even actual dating what kind of fish would get attracted/magnetized to your net.



  19.  #19Femininewoman on April 12, 2016 at 10:49 am

    Re 16 – I remember this one.



  20.  #20Femininewoman on April 12, 2016 at 10:54 am

    RE 7 – April Rose I read emails from a male coach who coaches men – Scot McKay. Sometimes I get the impression that men do send out naked pictures to impress women as he scolds them about not doing that if they want to stand out as a real man who has good intentions.



  21.  #21Emerson on April 12, 2016 at 11:24 am

    Thanks Indigo!!
    He is in his early 30s!
    I’m remaining open but I’m also keeping other men on my radar…so I don’t get that ‘urgent’ feeling…

    we shall see!



  22.  #22Femininewoman on April 12, 2016 at 12:12 pm

    Leigha Lake

    “If we don’t become aware of how powerful our feminine energy really is, we’ll attract situations to us that reflect back to us what we really believe about love and life.”



  23.  #23Indigo on April 12, 2016 at 12:32 pm

    I also think boldness is key when it comes to online dating.

    Being able to boldly say yes to what you do want, and just as boldly being able to say no to what you don’t want.

    Fearlessly accepting a date from a man who asks you out, but just as fearlessly letting a man go without a backward glance! To me that has been key in the quality of men being better and better as they showed up… and I believe this is something Labbit perhaps used to say as well? Being fearless. Not worrying, not being afraid. Not being afraid to say yes to a man, and also not being afraid of him leaving.



  24.  #24Millie on April 12, 2016 at 1:03 pm

    Thanks for all the feedback ladies!!! I actually did start a whole new dating profile this time around and feel really good about the pictures I posted and what I wrote in my bio. I AM attracting a lot more high quality men this time!! This guy mentioned is just one of many and is certainly not a reflection of EVERY man I am attracting by any means. My profile could always use improvement so I will definitely look in to all your recommendations. I am seeing this as PRACTICE!! This man is not the ONE, just one of many I get to practice expressing and being surprised with. I do not want to put myself in any potentially harmful situations so I AM listening to my gut and taking baby steps…something feels bad move away, something feels good enjoy it.

    On another note seems like everyone in my office is either pregnant or engaged or newlywed or married… I wonder if I should take that as I’m in the right place… But it does make feel very sad that I am oh so far away from having those things in my life.



  25.  #25Azure Blu on April 12, 2016 at 2:03 pm

    Millie #23
    Wow… all that you have shared sounds really good!

    New photos… New bio… better quality men!!

    I love what you said about this time these guys…
    “are all Practice”!!
    and from what you have shared – you were using feeling messages and telling “Mr. photos” what did and did NOT feel good.

    Yeah… sounds like, at your work, it might be “in the water” and our drinking it!!! I’m sure you’ll find Mr. right really soon!!!
    oxoxo



  26.  #26Dixie on April 12, 2016 at 4:24 pm

    Ohhhh Millie:

    “On another note seems like everyone in my office is either pregnant or engaged or newlywed or married… I wonder if I should take that as I’m in the right place… But it does make feel very sad that I am oh so far away from having those things in my life.”

    Millie, I feel the same way sometimes, that all I dream of is far away, and the memory of divorce and loss still pierces the softest part of my heart. It can feel bittersweet for you at work, I imagine. But never, ever, believe that it can’t be closer than you imagine! From here, it looks like all the steps you are taking are taking you closer to your hearts desire.

    I’m not sure how or when, but when I let myself “feel” those good feelings about being married again (yes, this is what I want, with a loving and attentive man) , almost like an emotional rehearsal, then those nasty “never” feelings sort of dissipate.

    I’m highly recommend visualizing what you want, or at the least, going through the emotional rehearsal of what it would feel like to be cherished, protected, loved, desired, filled up with love, proposed to, giddy with love, comforted, pregnant, whatever your sweet heart desires!



  27.  #27Emerson on April 12, 2016 at 8:21 pm

    Please ladies….beautiful sirens… just a reminder to be careful with people you meet out there…online and otherwise. Terrible story out of Seattle today, a woman was killed by a man she met online.
    Not to make anyone paranoid, but just BE CAREFUL!!!!!



  28.  #28BeLoved on April 12, 2016 at 8:32 pm

    I felt a little wavering back and forth since yesterday – I’m ok with this, I’m not ok with this, ok/not ok.
    Lather, rinse repeat.

    After jumping up and leaving class for a few minutes because I felt so charged up, I stuffed my inner little one in a trunk so I could finish my school assignment, ha 🙂 Then got to my car to do some mirror work and work it out between me and me.
    Lots of EFT on everything that came up.

    Hearing EMK’s words echo in my brain – it’s not the men we attract, it’s the men WE ACCEPT.

    I was feeling more resolved about my don’t wants, and then a male friend said to me, “a man who is living with his wife is not ‘getting a divorce’. He may be unhappily married, and looking for a little action on the side, but he’s not “getting a divorce” and I think deep down you know that.”

    And I was like….ok. I do believe that papers were filed, and…still, the rest all applies. And it sank in. Ok, thank you for the male perspective 🙂

    And I’ve been practicing a speech I will probably never give in my mind, because I don’t expect to see him again, about how this isn’t what I want. I feel my peace of mind return. In the future it will be very easy to turn down ‘getting a divorce’ guy, haha. It might be different if he weren’t living with his wife, but he is. So.

    I also noticed, I feel more inner bonded. When I felt these BIG CHEMISTRY feelings before, I remember feeling a thousand times more tortured. There was a thought, an inner voice, saying HE IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU and I remember crying and crying because I did not want to hear that voice because the chemistry felt soooo gooooooooood. I remember being that crazy person walking down the street arguing with herself, the conflicting inner dialogue was off the charts.

    Today I remembered all that, sat myself in front of the mirror and was like, HEY, do you remember that?? Okay, so I’m feeling like this again AND THIS MAN ISN’T ANYWHERE NEAR so this is NOT ABOUT HIM, this is ME, MY BRAIN, MY MIND so let’s get right inside, ok?

    And you know, just tonight, I heard a song in my mind that’s been bouncing around a lot lately. “I want to show you that my love is pure, I want to show you that my love is for real.” Suddenly it clicked – my inner boy was singing to my inner girl. He’s been trying so hard to be protector and my inner girl has been fighting and fighting the protection, because ALL THE FEELS. So this time around, there has been a lot more inner trust and I could feel those two sides of me coming together, so sweet and appreciative.

    I’ve been saying and feeling to Lanky, I trust you I trust you I trust you, I believe you care about me, I really do, I believe you don’t want to hurt me and you want to be good to me… and maybe, it’s all been about my girl energy loving my boy energy.



  29.  #29Indigo on April 12, 2016 at 10:04 pm

    Dixie 25,

    “I’m highly recommend visualizing what you want, or at the least, going through the emotional rehearsal of what it would feel like to be cherished, protected, loved, desired, filled up with love, proposed to, giddy with love, comforted, pregnant, whatever your sweet heart desires!”

    Yes yes yes!! I did this for so long, till it became a habit. I still do it. Daydreaming is scientifically shown to be very powerful and very beneficial. It’s soothing, it helps you to align yourself with what you want, and it builds faith in yourself if you can keep visualising what you want. You fall off the wagon when heartbreak happens, or during dead end relationships, but then as soon as you feel able again, keep visualising and imagining and feeling what you want for your life.

    I feel so happy at the moment. I finally feel as if I’m getting the right momentum going in doing my degree, and I’m with an emotionally available man who never, never causes me to feel even for a moment that I am not loved and treasured. He phones me and he texts me and he asks to see me and he makes plans with me, all without me having to do even the slightest bit of hinting or coaching.

    I’m not going to say it doesn’t come with fear though. I am afraid of failing one or two of my subjects, I am afraid of the workload and I am afraid that I will give up. I am afraid of the financial worries of paying for myself to study. I am afraid of burning out.

    Somewhere deep within me I am afraid of saying or doing something to push J away. I am also afraid of all the love, bizarre as it sounds. Not afraid that I am not worthy, but just afraid of a love that never stops coming because I am not used to it. I am used to people giving love and then withdrawing, giving love and then withdrawing. I’ve become so self-sufficient in those between times. I didn’t like it, it felt painful a lot of the time, but it was what I knew. But someone who is just there for me all the time? Someone who wants to know me and love me and fall deeper week by week? It’s scary and so beautiful my heart battles to hold the feeling.

    But I’m not going to focus on the fear. Fear is a lie really. We can do it. We ARE doing it. Love to all!!! <3



  30.  #30Posie on April 13, 2016 at 3:16 am

    BeLoved – I appreciated your post and how our mind fights with our intuition sometimes. I’ve also learned that the longer I allow that fight to occur, the more difficult it can be to make the right choice for myself. It all gets trickier and more complicated and ominous feeling. Sounds like you’ve caught yourself this time around and that seems very very strong to me!

    Indigo – it’s very nice to learn more about you! I can also relate to the sensations you’re expressing about J.

    Sometimes I really don’t know what the best thing is: at what point to I allow myself to fall into those amazing feelings that can come with a new relationship versus choosing to keep a bit of distance/space so I can stay in touch enough with reality that I CAN hear my intuition if she starts to warn me? I don’t know. That’s a tough thing, isn’t it?



  31.  #31Indigo on April 13, 2016 at 4:26 am

    Posie,

    I wonder exactly the same thing. Or I should say wondered, because my peace on this issue grows day by day.

    I think that caution, or keeping a bit of distance/space, takes a few different forms. And I think in certain contexts it’s wise, and in other contexts it can create distance between you and the other person that doesn’t need to be there. For example, on the issue of sex, I think a certain amount of distance or caution in the beginning is very wise for various reasons. Also on the issue of trust when it comes to the opposite sex – this is not something I assume or take for granted with a man. I don’t assume he is not dating or seeing other women, I also don’t assume that he doesn’t have habits regarding other women that would make me uncomfortable – things like faithfulness, close female friends, flirtatious behaviour, whatever… This whole realm of trust is something that has to be proved and earned for me, and until it is there is always a natural reserve on my part. This is just me, but experience has shown me that this is wise.

    Another aspect where it is wise to hold back a bit is obviously not leaning forward too much or overgiving or oversharing. But this is easy as long as his energy is always coming towards you more than yours is going towards him. But my personal feeling is this is not nearly as rigid or as big a deal as it’s sometimes believed to be.

    Aside from these things, my personal feeling is… OPEN UP. What have you got to lose? Share yourself, share your beautiful heart. Let other people, and especially the man you’re dating, see what makes you come alive, what you’re passionate about, what makes you sparkle, what makes you sad. Share yourself fearlessly. This has never done anything but endear me to men personally.

    Also I believe more and more, the man who is going to love you will make you feel safe. He will make it safe for you to share yourself and for you to come close and this kind of anxiety will get less and less until it is almost gone. The emotional closeness will grow and grow with the right guy, and when this happens I say go for it. Don’t hold back. You only have one life and you cannot control the future by holding back your feelings in the present. Being a woman means having the privilege of sharing all this emotional beauty with the world, and the right people will love and treasure you for that.



  32.  #32Victoria on April 13, 2016 at 4:43 am

    Posie,
    I look at it from a different angle. For me, attraction happens naturally, and if I happen to have a crush on someone, it is there before I saw it coming, so whether I make effort to contain the feelings is irrelevant, they are either there or they are not, and I would not be able to force them to appear if they are absent.
    So the question for me then becomes, at what point do I allow myself to be thinking about this man only, when do I stop CDing, when do I become exclusive with him. For me, the time would be after we have some sort of an exclusivity talk, or a declaration of love to each other. Otherwise, Rori says – until the ring or whatever you decide is a significant sign for you.



  33.  #33Azure Blu on April 13, 2016 at 5:34 am

    Lovely Sirens,
    Such strong soothing melodies, and vulnerable authentic sharing here on Siren Island…

    I too use visualization to change my life in the direction I want…
    Love life…
    Work life…
    Ohhhh… I haven’t used it for
    Family…
    Friends… I want to try that!!!

    So funny… a boyfriend I had off and on for 2 years,
    2 years ago…
    who had lied about the time he had been divorced (said 3 years when actually he had just gotten a divorce)
    was NOT ready for a relationship…
    and I chose to let him treat me VERY badly…
    when we would break up… I’d agonize… miss him sooo terribly… pine and get physically sick from missing him…
    by the end of the 2nd year – I would visualize that he would walk up to my door one day and my husband would answer the door!!!
    I visualized the feeling of…
    Me being VERY happy, sunlight streaming through the house… my husband – very masculine, tall, strong and adoring!! fixing a meal in the kitchen…
    and I would say to the ex… “I am married… you can’t come here anymore.”

    Sirens, this sorta happened last weekend…
    Spirit and I were at our favorite dancing place
    and my ex was there…
    Spirit is an amazing ballroom dancer and I’ve gotten better… so we look pretty good on the dance floor…
    Spirit is tall, strong, handsome and masculine…
    Very adoring out in public…
    All night long he had to watch us.
    I thank the ex for bringing me to Rori…
    But… it was nice to NOT be with the ex anymore
    and for him to see how happy I am!!!
    Visualizations work!!! :-))



  34.  #34Liquid Light on April 13, 2016 at 12:10 pm

    Wow Azure love that story and how you visualized your future, and it happened! You go, girl! Love it!



  35.  #35Starla on April 13, 2016 at 4:11 pm

    Feeling really alone and in the muck. I hate being alone in the muck. Curses!



  36.  #36BeLoved on April 13, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    Azure 32 – Awww, I love hearing this story, thank you! It feels good to realize you didn’t get where you are instantly and you’ve been through the crazy stuff, too. 😀



  37.  #37BeLoved on April 13, 2016 at 4:50 pm

    (((Starla)))
    Beloved peers into the muck with a soft golden light…
    ah, there you are! I see you!
    Here’s some love <3



  38.  #38BeLoved on April 13, 2016 at 4:52 pm

    My internship is finishing up soon, and my job leads are LOVING me, I heard one say under his breath today when I got assigned to work with him for a job, “that makes me verrry happy”. I believe they will hire me on permanently, and asked if I want to eventually be a lead position and I was all YES, of course!



  39.  #39BeLoved on April 13, 2016 at 4:56 pm

    Today I got the clear message that what is most important, is that I be at peace with me, and whatever my “vibe” is. If I’m vibing at “attracted to married man”, it’s really not the worst thing in the world and the more at peace I am with where I’m vibing, the more peace I am creating and attracting.



  40.  #40Azure Blu on April 13, 2016 at 6:00 pm

    Liquid and Beloved…
    I feel soo delighted that my journey was helpful for you to hear….

    Yay Beloved- Great to hear how your internship is getting you recognition and all kinds of accolades for your work!!!



  41.  #41Azure Blu on April 13, 2016 at 6:02 pm

    (((Starla)))
    sending you light and love… with Beloved…
    at the other end of the muck!!!
    oxoxo



  42.  #42Azure Blu on April 13, 2016 at 6:03 pm

    Liquid Light
    did you decide to go with K this weekend?



  43.  #43Indigo on April 13, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    (((Starla)))

    You are never alone. I’m in the muck regularly myself.



  44.  #44Tee on April 14, 2016 at 6:46 am

    (((Starla)))

    We’re here. I’m here



  45.  #45Leigha Lake on April 14, 2016 at 1:04 pm

    Feminine Woman (21) Thank you for sharing this! 🙂

    I truly believe our feminine energy is our “north star” and our “love compass.” It’s guiding us not only the man who can love us the way we’ve always wanted, but to everything we desire. <3 <3

    Love, Leigha



  46.  #46Emerson on April 14, 2016 at 10:19 pm

    Sirens…I love leaning back!
    My YoungCD hadn’t been in touch all day since this morning… And I was feeling.needy and wanting to lean forward…but I didn’t.
    Lo and behold he contacted me this evening and it felt good. Yay for leaning back!