Modern Siren Works!

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Here’s a short letter from Eve to give you hope that baby steps WILL work for you:

“Hi Rori

I’m not sure but I think it is working 🙂 I have your ebook and your siren series. I have been doing the same thing for years and years, not only with the men in my life, with everyone!

I’m a very emotional person and my negative emotions have always led me to shut off, put up walls, throw tantrums and be an out right bitch.

I also saw him drifting away so I clung on tighter. I would cling on so tight I’m sure i would have licked the dirt off his shoes just so he stayed.

We had a fight on Friday night. I read your beautiful informative insights on sat afternoon.

I used feeling messages (badly, I’m new at this) and he offered to make me a coffee on Tuesday at work 🙂

I was surprised!! I watched your siren video andIi loved it!

I made the mistake of going to his place the next Friday and saying “I want to be with you tonight”

I left feeling guilty and he texted saying he wanted to be by himself and couldn’t handle another Friday night like last week.

I accepted the NO!

I told him I felt OK with that and that I felt guitly about pressuing him and that I felt happy to be by myself. I left it a that.. he texted me at lunch time on sat saying “hey you 🙂 how’s your day” I texted back ” today feels great… how was your day?” he sent a msg back that i did not respond to as i was too busy with my girlfriend and then another, starting it with Hey Gorgeous!!

I feel empowered and I thank you! I lost myself in him and now I have found me! baby steps… baby steps and LOTS of love for ME!

Thank you Rori Xx Eve”

To read about my Modern Siren program (and see some video clips of it) – just click on the photo–>>



Love, Rori

Posted in


  1.  #1Daria on May 28, 2012 at 8:09 am

    Yah baby 🙂

  2.  #2T-Girl on May 28, 2012 at 8:24 am

    Yes, love Modern Siren!

  3.  #3April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 8:25 am

    “I lost myself in him…”

    I know that one.

  4.  #4Starla on May 28, 2012 at 8:28 am

    Modern Siren absolutely works

  5.  #5sophie on May 28, 2012 at 8:31 am

    It does work it totally works – I think Eve’s done brilliantly here – whenever my ex said ‘no’ or didn’t want to spend time with me it made me feel sick and terrified and abandoned – I really need to work on that – any suggestions anyone? 🙂

  6.  #6Starla on May 28, 2012 at 8:34 am

    I feel heartbroken every day still.

    I feel grateful for everything that happened, because now I can finally “meet” myself. I have been drifting around much of my life living out what has really been just an approximation of myself. I’ve been too distracted and wrapped up with men to get to know myself for certain. I feel completely unsure of and second guess myself in many many situations.

    I am starting to figure out now ‘who i am.’ and i am finding that people are actually totally accepting of this, and won’t punish me for not being different from who i really am. i am envisioning turning down people’s social invitations simply because i don’t like to hang out in large groups very much. and the person inviting me is smiling and saying ohhh come on please, and i’ll say no and they’ll make a face but love me anyway, or i’ll say okay i’ll come by just for an hour, or they’ll say it’s important to them and I’ll definitely be there.

  7.  #7sophie on May 28, 2012 at 8:34 am

    I lost myself in him – me too – that’s the line that stood out most for me

  8.  #8sophie on May 28, 2012 at 8:39 am


    I still think its amazing how you’ve dealt with your situation and how strong you seem to be – what comes across from your comments is that you have TOTALLY channelled all of your energies into you and big respect to you – i recognize that with my break up and his subsequent seeing of other woman its thrown up all the feelings of no worth etc that I thought I’d worked really hard on and rather than doing what amazing you are doing I’m kind of reaching out externally and hoping other men will give me validation – its hard theres a fine line between moving on quickly and receiving the attention of other men in order to be healing (which it is) and not using it to feel ok about myself. I am trying to put a lot of energy into validating myself and working with my own triggers too – hopefully that is progress 🙂

  9.  #9Starla on May 28, 2012 at 8:39 am

    sophie that is a huge trigger for me, too. maybe we can figure it out together, hmmmm.

    hmm the first thing that comes to mind is that if i am feeling triggered when a man doesn’t want to spend time with me, it’s because i’m disproportionately invested in this man. Probably because he hasn’t offered a commitment that makes me feel secure and ‘chosen’ by him. so i feel abandoned when the only thing we have that binds us together – time spent together – isn’t happening.

  10.  #10sophie on May 28, 2012 at 8:44 am

    Yes I understand that – I invest waaaayyyy to much waaaayyyyy too soon I see myself doing it even at the moment with men on the internet that I havfen’t even met 🙂 I am being a bit easy on myself though as I know I’m in a vulnerable place and not at maximum ‘siren’ity or divaness. I give my power away alll the time. Mostly when I’m in a relationship and they don’t want to spend time with me I somehow equate it in my mind with they don’t love me. Maybe this is just a bottom liner for me that I need someone who does like to spend a lot of time with me – I definitely need someone who stays connected when they’re not with me. My ex didn’t and it freaked me out.

  11.  #11Starla on May 28, 2012 at 8:53 am

    sophie, #8 – We are all different, though. I think it could be perfectly healthy to ‘get your groove back’ with other men.

    But, I *always* had men in the picture for the last 8 years. I would break affections with one and turn immediately to another. I’ve been lucky in that there is ALWAYS a suitor to be found, which is awesome. It has given me something I was unable to give myself all that time.

    Now I am trying something different because I do feel brave enough to really face myself, and I also feel like I hit a ‘bottom’ in a few ways, because the side effects of my mancrack addiction (not knowing myself well enough) really contributed to my own heartbreak (and his) with a man I loved truly.

    My case is an extreme one, so I’m avoiding that whole arena for a while. I DID turn to other guys for attention immediately after (and even during) the break up, but I could feel that it was not the best thing for me to do at the time. I’m glad to have finally shaken off the mancrack. I feel guilty that it took me getting angry and turned off by Alaska to do it. In the end, I still played out my story as the rebound queen. Poor Alaska ((((((((((alaska)))))))).

    I am just listening to my heart and to the universe and following it where it goes. I am on an incredible journey.

    I miss him
    I missed me more

    Thank you so much for the encouragement!!

  12.  #12sophie on May 28, 2012 at 8:58 am

    11. You’re welcome. You’re inspiring to me 🙂

  13.  #13Femininewoman on May 28, 2012 at 9:00 am

    I feel so turned off by the statement “I lost myself in him”. When I read it I ended up feeling like a rope was around my neck with a ball of steel at the end. I prefer to think of myself as moving forward in a relationship where I also have the option to move backward so I can breathe new fresh air from another source. Get new experiences, new perspectives I can share. Losing myself is something I choose not to identify with. The thought of that feels like energy Clanging back and forth in my head. I choose to be me.

  14.  #14Starla on May 28, 2012 at 9:06 am

    There is such a self-serving quiet in this space that is disconnected from men. I am hearing the universe speak to me SO CLEARLY about which direction to take and I feel so incredibly inspired.

    Sometimes I feel so in sync with the energetic world around me that I start to worry that I’m paranoid and losing touch with reality. But my heart is telling me that it’s okay to let the ‘good’ gut feelings and omens run the show for a while. I silence the bad ones, like paranoia there’s going to be an earthquake and stuff. Of course there’s going to be an earthquake.. one day in all of time there will certainly be one here (there was already one last year), so I acknowledge that energy but I don’t “vote” for it. I vote for the good energy and draw it nearer and sooner to me.

    Please let me know if I sound like a mad woman. I feel self conscious!!

  15.  #15LoveAlways on May 28, 2012 at 9:10 am

    Good for you Eve! I’m working on my feeling messages too – I’m not the greatest at it 🙂 Love this article!

    Enjoy the holiday Sirens! Hope you are having a great day!


  16.  #16Femininewoman on May 28, 2012 at 9:14 am

    RadLove I am thinking of you on your job. I am really wishing and feeling good about this one working out.

  17.  #17Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 9:14 am

    Starla what you wrote in #6 is almost exactly how I feel but could not put into words.

    I went to sleep and woke up feeling very sad and heartbreaky and hopeless and out of touch with how to feel better about anything….

    I’m still working on it. I feel lost and don’t know if I should just move away and start fresh in a new town and “force myself” to be in that uncomfortable zone….

    I don’t know…

  18.  #18April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 9:15 am

    Losing myself is not something I would choose either, FW.

    However I have a challenge in this lifetime:

    in my birthchart, in the house of relationships, there is an aspect of ‘extruding into the partner’ which means I need to practice moment by moment awareness in order to NOT actively merge my energy into theirs.

    I struggle to maintain myself as the focus.

  19.  #19Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 9:16 am

    FW thank you for sharing what you said in 13

  20.  #20Starla on May 28, 2012 at 9:17 am

    We lose ourself in all our addictions. We don’t choose, we go through the motions that our addictions choose for us.

    i intend to be free from all addictions.

  21.  #21LoveAlways on May 28, 2012 at 9:20 am

    Last thread # 814

    Thanks for sharing the story about your hiking date. I love masculine energy men too! No problem leaning back smiling a sweet smile! And good for you using a feeling message to get him to stop speeding!

  22.  #22Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 9:20 am

    I’m feeling lost and panicky and I am hoping this means that something is on the horizon for me….

  23.  #23Starla on May 28, 2012 at 9:21 am

    I love that Eve is seeing how she doesn’t need to use drama to get the love she craves.

    Drama also prevents us from seeing that the man we’re dealing with is unable to give us the love we crave.

    Also, men are pretty dramatic too!


  24.  #24Starla on May 28, 2012 at 9:25 am

    My search for a car has stalled. I don’t know what’s up with that. There’s nothing new coming into the used market that catches my eye, and I can just feel that it’s not time yet. The car will come to me… I will not have “decided” on it from a pool of many options, hoping it’s the best choice. The car will come to me and it will be the only option. Or I will have a few perfect cars to choose from, and they’ll all be equally good options:)

  25.  #25Starla on May 28, 2012 at 9:35 am

    I am about to leave but I just wanted to share something very big that just happened!

    I just got an email from that person I went to dinner with last night, the ‘influential’ person I told you guys about. And my NVs were going crazy even this morning about how he must think I’m stupid and how awful it is that I spit my food out laughing. I even wanted to text him to apologize for it (but I didn’t)!

    The email is super intense, like “how come we’re not getting together more, no excuses!!”

    awwww my NVs are so wrong! ((((((((((((NVs)))))))))))))

  26.  #26Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 9:41 am

    25 yay Starla!

  27.  #27Femininewoman on May 28, 2012 at 9:46 am

    April Rose thanks for sharing that. The words we use gives us hints to our insides and some vows we unconsciously make. Words like struggle. Challemge. The perspective we give to them. The vows me make when we kinda agree to what has been decided by others about us. Maybe charts and astrology does have some impact on my preloaded program but I like the concept of being curious about me. Thinking that it is easy to re-present myself to the world, in babysteps. I am the Goddess who gets the create my program my programs, my playground. The concept of being open to change appeals to me. To concept of change being easy appeals to. To concept of me creating my self, my life feels exciting to me and have me feeling all euphoric about the possibilities. I like to pour fairydust all over myself in my mind.

  28.  #28April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 9:55 am

    Femininewoman, I feel a lightness in my heart reading what you wrote.
    Especially about being the Goddess who gets to create herself – wow!

    I so want to feel euphoric and joyful and light and easy.

    I intend to drop somehow my investment in ‘struggle’, ‘challenge’, and effort of any kind.

  29.  #29April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 10:39 am

    I seem to have bought into the belief that life is a struggle.

  30.  #30sunshine on May 28, 2012 at 10:39 am

    thanks Daria and Emoticon on comments about feeling weird about overcomplimentary fake guy…

    tapping into it I feel like when a guy is overly nice I question if he means it and then I feel sad, I dont want to feel excited about someone who will lead me on and hurt me later 🙁 I feel uncomfortable because of what happened with guy I fell in love with who was so nice at first I think I still have alot of healing to do:(

  31.  #31April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 10:39 am

    …and that relationships are near to impossible…..

  32.  #32Emoticon on May 28, 2012 at 10:54 am

    Deja Vu!! I could have sworn i read this article right when i was thinking about getting modern siren and then i was wondering if anybody who doesnt have it yet wanted to go half on it…. but maybe my friend would wanna go half on it with me. She’s my one friend who is open to being introduced to the world of Rori.

  33.  #33Emoticon on May 28, 2012 at 10:58 am

    Daria… from other blog…. bootycallCD texted back today and apologized, said he did not see me as a booty call….. and gave an excuse, that he only calls me at night cuz thats when he’s free. Then he sent another message saying sorry 🙂 i feel appreciative…. he cares enough to apologize, explain, apologize again…. thats sweet.

  34.  #34Emoticon on May 28, 2012 at 11:01 am

    FW (from the other post) …. Thank you…. I will do some research before i decide if and how i will be lightening. There are pills that do it but I think it just lightens generally, not sure if it evens skin tone. Maybe I have other options….

  35.  #35Emoticon on May 28, 2012 at 11:06 am

    You are welcome Sunshine!!

    One of my fave CDs right now…. i was weirded out by him at first…. he used to keep saying “you are so beautiful” alllllll the time n i would feel a little uncomfortable. Probably because i didnt want to believe him.

    I love it now…. i feel amazed when he says it in front of other people too…. he would be like “OMG” n everyone would be like what…. n he’d say “You are so beautiful” to me…. n i blush my face off

  36.  #36Emoticon on May 28, 2012 at 11:12 am

    Matthew and Orna’s Love Notes Weekly, this week’s note

    “Shower someone with love when they are upset and you will watch the miracle of love unfold. ”

    This is what Daria helped me realize last night.

  37.  #37Jessie1000 on May 28, 2012 at 11:33 am

    My counsellor today told me to start looking at every man and woman as a human being rather than a suitor or potential anything.

    To view each interaction as it is not about the future. To think about each day as a new time to have fun and make yourself and them happy. Not as if they will be anywhere in your future.

    Pretend they do not exist in the future and as if this second or moments are the only time they will have with you. When they leave, release them into the universe and thank them for the experience you had with them and let them go like a bird into the sky …free and happy.

    Thats so friggin hard to do.

    No more control for me or to exert onto anyone else.

    Same for children, make every experience as warm and close and as your memory and their memory and then release their thoughts as part of the universe!!

    New ways to approach life!!

    I love it

  38.  #38Rebecca on May 28, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Wow – NVs feel so REAL don’t they… Arghh

  39.  #39Jessie1000 on May 28, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    OMG! What is an NV? please tell me?
    Im so not in the loop lol

  40.  #40Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    37 Jessie thank you for this reminder….
    I like this idea and it reminds me of the Landmark concepts (they are classes/conferences which I have friends who have attended but I have not myself)

    I am feeling very restless/tired/lonely/angry/fat/ugly all at the same time today. 🙁

  41.  #41Emerson on May 28, 2012 at 12:16 pm

    NV = negative voices

  42.  #42ReceivingGirl on May 28, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    Oh, I have a lot of catching up to do from yesterday. I just got home from spending 24 hours with Mr. Observant and it was the absolute most wonderful first date I’ve ever had. I feel so light, free, respected and happy.

    I will elaborate more later because I have to do some things around here first.

    I noticed all the bj talk on the blog yesterday. I agree, I also love it, and maybe it is a power thing, knowing I am making him feel so good. It’s a huge turn on for me and by the sounds he makes, I know I am good at making him feel good. I don’t feel it’s overfunctioning at all. I think in that department it’s way okay to give if you enjoy giving it.

  43.  #43R.N.AmazingMe on May 28, 2012 at 1:14 pm

    Crazy that a grown azzzzz man will have the balllllssss to actually ask you fo money, help him out. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww,

  44.  #44Francesca on May 28, 2012 at 1:17 pm

    Well, I discovered yesterday that the smile tool works.

    All it took was a smile to turn a situation around.

    It instantly worked and the rest of the day was spent in harmony.

    Things could’ve turned out nasty but instead, the atmosphere changed as soon as I smiled to him after we had a small argument.

    He apologized and so did I and we decided to do something fun since the weather was so nice.

    I feel pretty proud of myself.

    And I’m proud of my man too, since he’s starting to respond better to some of the things I say and do.

    It’s not perfection but it’s pretty good.

  45.  #45Francesca on May 28, 2012 at 1:20 pm

    Ewww, sounds icky, RNAmazingMe.

    I’m happy to see you’re not falling into the trap.

  46.  #46R.N.AmazingMe on May 28, 2012 at 1:25 pm

    @45 yes thanks those days are no more:)

  47.  #47Tereana on May 28, 2012 at 1:37 pm

    Starla – #6

    That sounds beautiful (((hugs)))

  48.  #48LoveAlways on May 28, 2012 at 1:40 pm


  49.  #49Tereana on May 28, 2012 at 1:42 pm

    @LoveAlways #21 – Thanks!

    Yeah, I felt pretty good about that. But not in any kind of “superior” way, like I “did” something. But good, because he responded to me, and it wasn’t difficult and nobody had a fight. lol

    It felt good, because that’s what I remember as a kid, even in a similar situation – my mom nagging and my dad getting annoyed and pushing back.

    So it felt good that, at least this time, I had a totally different experience.

    Hooray, I am not my parents! lol

  50.  #50sunshine on May 28, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    Emoticon thats great! I will practice recieving for sure

  51.  #51Tereana on May 28, 2012 at 1:56 pm

    I feel a bit weird in that I might have “leaned forward” with my Mountain Man/Nascar driver (lol). It’s been a couple of days, so I was thinking about it, and suddenly, I wanted to thank him. So I did. Short and sweet, just a text saying I had a good time and thank you. Not much, but it could be considered leaning forward.

    BUT it is also the FIRST and only time that I have leaned forward with him. Even when he didn’t contact me for a week, or more, I didn’t send him anything.

    So I’m just waiting.

    He’s probably at a barbecue with his friends or something (and totally thinking about the resourceful, complex, beautiful woman he went hiking with on Saturday ; ) and he’ll get back to me later. : )

    There was one other cool thing that he said to me on Saturday.

    He knew about RoBoat, because I met him at the same event where the whole thing went down, and I was upset and he let me talk about it with him. I expected him to be judgmental of me, but he wasn’t. He actually understood my feelings, and was supportive.

    Last weekend, he wanted to take me to a movie, but I couldn’t. I was away all weekend (focusing on me : )

    This past Saturday, he said that he wanted to “prove to me” that “good men do exist.”

    Aw…I feel all giggly and blushy just thinking about it. 🙂

  52.  #52Daria on May 28, 2012 at 2:56 pm

    rori talks about blow jobs in Targerting Mr Right

    she says, what do you do when its gets to that stage – do you pleasure him first and give him a blowjoy?


    think of sex as *sex=my orgasm, my pleasure*


    this felt so empowering for me!

    i feel good going down on a guy when I feel turned on by the eroticism of it (in a kinda of tantra way), nto if he asks me to or to make him feel good

    i only do it in ways that feel literally PLEASURABLE to me

    i used to do it to pleasure Him…

    i noticed for me to feel comfortable and open to it , he either has gone down on me first or has offered to

  53.  #53Daria on May 28, 2012 at 2:59 pm

    it used to be a power thing for me – blowjobs – , and now its not really even that so much anymore… its really about my tactile and sexual enjoyment and pleasure – it feels really erotic and pleasurable for me and gets my nani throbbing and i feel so turned on

    i dont even push myself to make him cum anymore…

    i just do what feels good to me only and stop when im not feeling 100 good or if i notice myself goin out of my body into my head

  54.  #54Daria on May 28, 2012 at 3:00 pm

    sucking just turns me on, even sucking on a finger or thumb while having sex feels sooooo good to me that i can kinda focus on that and allow myself to feel more pleasure from the sex rather than focus too much and shut down my pleasure

  55.  #55Dominique on May 28, 2012 at 3:27 pm

    By the way when giving a bl*wjob, a man will this enjoy so much more if you are pleasing yourself while doing it. You don’t need to worry about him. It’s easy for him.

    I suggest being curious about his penis.

    Looks at it closely, touch it, lick on it, suck on it in ways that feel interesting to you. The testicles too if you want or not. Do as your mood and feelings take you.

    And you don’t need to feel obligated to get him to come.

    Try putting it inside you instead.

    And if you are left wanting more for yourself, either ask for for release or take care of it yourself. Men love to watch this. And if he feels insecure about this, then it’s time to rethink the man.


  56.  #56Sassy on May 28, 2012 at 3:33 pm

    Where is SLV???!!!

  57.  #57Dominique on May 28, 2012 at 3:47 pm

    Having computer difficulties.


  58.  #58April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 3:54 pm

    I have never enjoyed a man putting his finger into my belly button until tonight.

    It felt like a firework went off in my belly and shot a shower of red, gold and silver electric sparkles all round inside my tummy and into my lower back.


  59.  #59April Rose on May 28, 2012 at 3:57 pm

    I actually jumped like I’d had an electric shock.

    I felt real vulnerable letting him do that. And sooo melty.

    I want to feel that sensation again.

  60.  #60Sassy on May 28, 2012 at 4:44 pm

    And another new thread is up!!! WOOHOOOOOOO

  61.  #61ReceivingGirl on May 28, 2012 at 5:35 pm

    @18 April Rose

    What aspect shows that?

  62.  #62Daria on May 28, 2012 at 6:37 pm

    lol i just kicked my sweet CD out he took me out to eat and he would pay for my room but now my dad freakin got me a ticket for tomorrow… so i AM just gonna go tomorrow and then thinking to come back and rent a place for a month in 3 weeks 🙂 hehehehehehee

    take that haters

    (noticing battle pattern)

  63.  #63Daria on May 28, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    this CD is older and very protective and he wants to fly me back 🙂 and he is gonna help me rent a place

  64.  #64Brandylion on May 28, 2012 at 9:25 pm

    I talked to PriestCD tonight–a friendly conversation–and he told me that he’s seeing someone now. (We broke up in mid-March.) It’s a woman who’s been his friend for several years; they go to Bible study together, and she came out to Arizona at the end of our summer program last year to go sight-seeing with him for a week. He said that he’d never seriously considered dating her before, and that he hadn’t realized she was interested.

    I feel jealous! I feel sad! I feel angry! How am I so easily replaced? I know how–I was far more emotionally invested than he, so he has had less healing and “moving on” to do. The same thing happened with the only other relationship I’ve ever been in, in college, and it bothered me far less then, but it did bother me.

    How is it that I am struggling so much even to get to a first date? It is not fair! I have to remind myself that fairness isn’t everyone gets the same, but everyone gets what they need.

    Why do I need this struggle, with so few men showing up at all, and the ones that do not being Mr. Desirable? Because I have healing to do. Why do I have healing to do? Because I want it ALL.

    I feel *so* afraid to want it. I feel so afraid even to try to get it. Disappointment and powerlessness hurt so much! There is so much of this that is completely out of my control. I am having a hard time reconciling my very strong internal locus of control with this fact.

    I finished listening to TMR today, and CDing the way it’s described there sounds like too much effort. I felt so overwhelmed by all the things it sounds like I need to be doing differently to make it work. That’s a moot point, I guess, since I’m not actually making it to first meetings.

    Am I really to believe that while life is not just something that happens to me, love is? Am I really so powerless? No, I have choices. I just don’t know what and how to choose differently right now. No, that’s not true. I have to choose to get myself doing things that men do too, to get into places where men are. I feel resentful that the things I spend my time doing are not enough for me to meet a man, and that I have to carve time out to develop new activities and interests.

    I don’t want to join a running group so that I can meet men while running! I like running alone! It is my me-time, when I process a lot of the other things going on in my life.

    I don’t want to change from belly dance class to a salsa or ballroom class! I don’t want to change my budgeting of money and time so that I can afford both!

    I don’t want to give up the quiet time I spend alone. I need quiet time alone every day to rest and recharge and to feel okay.

    I don’t know how to make time in my schedule for dating and the activities I already do and the new ones I need to start and my job. I don’t even have friends that I spend time with regularly! I see the women during dance class when I don’t have school obligations that keep me from going, and there are two that I have dinner with about once every two or three months. That’s it! That’s all the socializing I do outside of my job!

    I don’t know how to manage this. My boy feels bad because he can’t meet all of my girl’s wants and needs, and my girl feels bad because not all of her needs and wants are being met.

  65.  #65Radlove on May 29, 2012 at 12:17 am


    16 – “RadLove I am thinking of you on your job. I am really wishing and feeling good about this one working out.”

    How thoughtful and kind of you, thank you! They pushed my start date to Monday, June 4th. I feel excited! I have gotten a lot done at home to get organized, and I have a lot more to do.

    I feel good about this one working out, too! I feel in a much stronger place, and altho I feel happy to say I will be growing and becoming all my life, I feel like my emotional self feels more settled, solid, and strong!

  66.  #66Radlove on May 29, 2012 at 12:26 am


    64 – Schedule prioritizing has always felt like a challenge to me, too. Sometimes busyness can’t be helped, but I feel most in sync with my girl when I keep a relaxed schedule.

    I try to romance myself by slowing down my pace of life. Right now I am about to head into a busy time with starting a new job with a 1 hr 15 min commute each way. I feel a little apprehensive about that, and I am trying to reprogram myself to feel jubilant that “I get to work! Yippee!” and to make the job itself an exercise in femininity…feeling my way thru the workday, even tho as a technical writer, I will be using my boy energy and mind mucho.

    Most often, my positions allow me to listen to instructional CDs as I work, and I feel excited about having 8 hours a day again to be paid for training! I have all my Rori CD programs lined up to take to work, one by one, along with Tony Robbins and a couple of others! When I do, that, I work with better concentration (because my heart and soul feel fed!) and my work days just sail by!

    I want to rejoin the Y and swim regularly. I can also swim in the bay, but I feel better doing laps and being in clear water with no creatures! I feel scared swimming in fresh water! LOL! Gnarly little (and big!) sea creatures want to bite me and touch me with their tentacles and fins, LOL!

    Anyway, I hope you are able to weigh and set priorities that feel most healthy for you!

  67.  #67Radlove on May 29, 2012 at 12:38 am


    I feel confuzzled…you are going to rent a place for only a month?

    I feel happy you are taking care of you and returning if that feels good.

  68.  #68lana on May 29, 2012 at 3:07 am

    Dear Rori,

    I could really use some advise and guidance here. I have been listening to a few of your programmes already, modern siren, love scripts, toxic men and am about to purchase your ebook too. Perhaps i got into you too late to save my relatinship which ended 5 weeks ago. we were madly in love, couldn’t get enough of eachother and managed to survive long distance in different countries. the weel before we broke up he told me he was scared at how strongly he felt for me and that i was everythign in a woman he could ever want. when we broke up he said i couldn’t tap into everything i was capable of offering him and that he was breaking up with me because of circumstances that prevent me from doing this. since then i have been working to eliminate those circumstances, break old habits and grow. We had a bad fight where i became histerical and needy and slapped him. it was more of a slap for me that him but he ended it then. i feel very ashamed of that slap but it was what i needed to wake up into awareness and to take charge of my life. I really love my man and i feel he is a good man but i realise now how it was my doing that drove him away. i started to loose myself in the relationship because i gave so much of myself away, i sacrificed myself. i because needy and brought too much drama to him over the last few months and he is in a new country feeling destabilised and unsupported by me. we have had a long distance relationship for 1 yr 3 months and i love him so much my heart hurts to think we are apart. i now realise that i do not need him but i value him so much that i want only him. i feel i have so much awareness and insight now after taking the time to spend on myself and would like to try again with all this awareness but i can’t tell him this and i dont know what to do to reattract him. i feel we are meant to be together. i am learning from my mistakes and feel open and love most of the time but some days i feel so sad and angry at him for leaving, although i do understand his side for why he left. i have bought and read christian carters inside the mind of a man and ebook too in an attempt to better my understanding and become a better version of myself and be able to love better, less selfishly. you both keep saying that a man changes his mind very quickly and i wonder can you help advise me how i can win my man back without having to chase him? we have a 5 yr difference and i am the older one, he is 25 but i know he is mature and i feel we are aligned in our paths. we met up one and a half weeks ago to return our things and i felt that he still loved me. we both became emotional, talked about the relationship a little, a mistake, i know, we both cried and both showed how much we care for one another. he wants to stay friends as he says he values me as a great woman. he said i couldn’t bring him the peace and love he desperately needed after a hard day’s work and in a way he’s right because i allowed my fear of loosing him to overtake me and to destabilise me. i couldn’t grasp this in time, despite his offering me guidance on it. i feel like i am loosing him and i want to live my life with him not without. alhtough i know i can live without him, i just dont want to. i know my biggest mistake is not living in the now and i feel i have progressed and changed considerably yet i feel lost as to how to proceed. am i not being patient enough with him? am i not giving him enough time? he doesn’t ignore me when i try to contact him and he will do small things to help me out but lately i feel he is trying to avoid me, like logging out of skype when i log in. i feel he is sending me mixed signals, or am i being too hopeful an is he gently trying to make me go away? Please could you offer me some guidance as to wheret o go to feel happier in myself when i feel sad. most days i am feeling good, keeping myself busy, even trying to date other men, but i have little interest. have i blown it for good? I wuold really appreciate your input and advise Rori and thank you in advance! love, lana.

  69.  #69Radlove on May 29, 2012 at 8:25 am

    It is hot today! Doing housework and organizing so I am all set to go to my new job. Oh yes, also looking into replacing my phone.

  70.  #70Rori Raye on May 29, 2012 at 8:47 am

    lana, Welcome – and your letter says it all – you know where you need to work. You are, at the moment, expressing yourself in dramatic, high-maintenance ways. While you work on those through my programs and perhaps some coaching (try Virginia Clark at or Dominique at, or try my “Love Forever” program) – the key here is to LOVE yourself EXACTLY as you are right now, and relax, sink into, and accept everything that goes along with it. Own it. Declare it. Things will change. Love, Rori

  71.  #71Margarita on May 29, 2012 at 3:59 pm

    I can identify with this blog……………….I met a wonderful man playing a game on Facebook, we met after 2 months, he is from Australia and spent the best 10 days of my life. He was very loving and attentive, would text me, call me and skype me 2 and 3 times a day…………he was married at the time and so was I. I cameback and shortly after he left his wife and we began making plans to being with each other, I went back 6 weeks later and helped him set up his new place, he was again very loving and would give me and take me anywhere and again made plans for the future. When I got back to the US within 2-3 weeks I began to notice a change in him, he wasn’t as attentive, I in the meantime, broke my marriage up and tried to get the support I needed from him as much as the support I had given him when he went through it……………..I didn’t get it, in fact he pulled right back and said he was rushing into something he wasn’t ready and he wanted to go slower, but he still loved me…………he had plans to come to America for 3 weeks and everything was set and then he cancelled and said he wasn’t in love and he needed space and he wanted to be single because he had been married for 30 years………….he did a 360 degrees turn around and I feel like I have been suckered punched, I feel used and deceived and so hurt all I do is cry…………… marriage is done and here I am left with nothing……………please help Rori, I need to find out how I can get this man back, I really fell in love with him and he is my soulmate, I have looked for this man my whole life and now that I found him, I lost him so fast and unexpectedly……………PLEASE HELP ME!!!! I AM DESPERATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  72.  #72Rori Raye on May 29, 2012 at 4:26 pm

    Margarita, I’ve deleted your last name for your privacy…Here’s the short answer: Don’t try to get this man back! DROP HIM! He needs space, he did NOT try to hurt you on purpose…you have NOT been deceived or used, and if you hold onto that view of this, it will be harder and harder for you to let go of him and find a good man to be with for the rest of your life. You are just out of a marriage – what you need is to grieve and learn about men by Circular Dating. It’s your inexperience that led you to this, and now let’s get you some experience! Love, Rori

  73.  #73Lana on June 1, 2012 at 2:34 am

    Dear Rori,
    Thank you for the advise. It has been 6 weeks now and although I am feeling stronger and fully accepting and aware of how much I have changed by simply working on myself, I still have days when I feel so lost and in love with him still. I know I want him back but I also know i do not want to chase him or put pressure on him. i love the new me because it’s what i have been waiting all my life to bring out. i feel free and happy and good and i still love him and i would love to share my new skills with him in a new relatinoship that is better than our old one. i have been out on a couple dates, although i founs this hard, i still did it. and it helped, i feel good, i have been trying circular dating and i find men are easily drawn to me as i passs them in the street or in shops and i just smile now and it feels good. but i still feel like i want my man back, is this normal? can i ever reattract him back? is it too early to make contact? he lives in a different country 2.5 hours away and we are due to meet up in 3 weeks as he has promised to give me some documents i left on his laptop after we returned our things last time we saw eachother 2 weeks ago. am i rushing too much? it’s been 6 weeks an although we have had some contact in that time and he isn’t refusing to speak to me, he is being friendly and wants us to be friends and to use the distance to get over our emotional connection, but i feel scared i will loose him. i realise that if i loose him you may saythen he is not the man for me, but i then why do i feel like he is the one for me? being with him goes against our circumstances, our families a little because they want him to marry a woman of his own country, against society because i am older, yet i feel like he is the one. i feel ok without him, i do not feel like i cannot live without him but i want to share my life with him! i want a better relationship for us, one i know we can achieve because i can fel it in my whole being. Please help me if i sound like i am deluding myself. why do i feel this so strongly? i feel strong in myself and felt that i needed this time to work on myself so that i can bring out that woman in me i know i have but never gave myself the time or space to do. i feel ready now. i know i am not there 100% but that is because i feel ready to continue learning and experimenting and growing for the rest of my life. i am not scared anymore of letting go, i no longer feel i want to control my man, the situation, the outcome, i feel happier when i just let go. the last thing he said to me was that although he told me i was everything in a woman he could ever want, he couldn’t help me bring it out, he needed it and i couldn’t bring it out for him, so he doesn’t think we are right for eachother because e couldn’t get there together. but i feel that i was so busy overworking in the relationship i couldn’t do this then. i needed time to do it and i feel that we can make it work. i know i can’t tell him, so how do i show him this and help him feel this? do i email him, wait until we meet? please help! it would feel so goog to receive some more guidance because your previous reply was so perfect. thank you Rori! Lovem lana

  74.  #74Lana on June 1, 2012 at 2:45 am

    In re-reading my post I feel that I still sound a little orientated on ‘me’ and not so much feeling his needs. What do you think?
    If I am honest, I feel maybe he needs more time. I cannot push him because it is the last thing he needs right now. I feel that giving him his independence and freedom is just what he needs. So I will continue to work on myself and hopefully just being ‘me’ will help to reattract him. It is hard because we do not see eachother and after this last time we are unlkely to see eachother it he forseable future. So it feels like our next meet up is the make-or-break situation, yet it feels too soon for him.
    Am i thinking too much into this, shall i just sit back and relax more and let whatever happens happens without being more active in re-attracting my man back? What do you suggest, Rori? xxx

  75.  #75Marie on June 2, 2012 at 5:34 pm

    Dear Rori,
    i have been with this wonderful guy for 3 years. We’ve had our ups and down but its to the point now where he has become very distant. We met in college he ended up graduating but i have a year left before i graduate, he went back home while i’m still in school. We tried to see each other whenever it was possible since he works and i’m still in school. Its been 3 months since we last saw each other and everything was great, we talked about what we wanted to do once i graduate, which is to get married and have a family. He even proposed to me 2 years ago. It is so much to write i don’t think i can write all of it in the comment box. He doesn’t call, text or even do the things he used to do anymore and when i call he keeps the conversation short or always say he has to go. I don’t know what to do anymore because everything i do doesn’t work. i tried not to worry myself but i think its to the point where we might end up saying good bye to each other. What should i do?

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  77.  #77Verona on September 7, 2012 at 9:05 pm

    Hello there! This is my first comment here so I just wanted to give a quick
    shout out and say I truly enjoy reading through your posts.
    Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that go over the same subjects?
    Thanks a ton!

  78.  #78Dominique on September 8, 2012 at 10:50 am

    Hello Verona – I’m a friend of Rori’s, and I spend a fair amount of time here helping out as a coach, per her request and also because this is what I do, and I love what I do.

    I have a site of my own filled with articles, free downloads, etc. dealing with relationships and restoring personal power.

    If you click on my name, it will take you to my site.


  79.  #79Yogi on October 30, 2012 at 9:02 pm

    I have been studying the ways of the mythical Sirens for the last three years and I will have to say that yout program is amazing! Keep up the good work and keep it coming!
    Ladies, from a man’s point of view who is a Siren in male form just know that our art and power do not lie in our looks, but in our heads. Always vote for yourself abd never lose site of what you want and always know that they are easy to catch. I have had both straight and gay men who have fallen under my Siren spell and lost their heads. Live life to the fullest and have no regrets.