Romantic Partnership Without Distraction

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A recent post was about “dealbreakers” in a relationship…About “partnership” – and the quality requirements a man has to have in order to be a good partner for you.

One of the topics that came up was “smoking weed.”

You can read my original post here->

And this is a brilliant reply to my post from “Sara”:

“My beef with partners, or even friends, consuming weed in my presence is whether or it makes them significantly less present.

I don’t care what the means of distraction is–whether it’s constantly looking at the phone; being overly preoccupied with work; having a few too many drinks; being stoned; unable to turn off the TV; whatever… You can tell when someone is not present.

And then I guess it depends on the situation or amount of time you’re spending together (every body should be allowed to live as they please).

Anyway… that’s the question I ask myself: in this moment of intimacy, are we present for each other?”

My Answer:

Sara – what you’ve written here is beautiful, and, for me, exactly the way I feel.

It’s all about partnership.

Not just romantic, not just friends or family – but all of us, in the whole world.

If we could all build a partnership with each other, instead of dividers, imagine what this world would be like right now….as it is, it takes courage just to get up in the morning and navigate the lack of partnership all around us, the lack of presence.

This is why we all look for “distraction” and create it as an automatic “go to.”

For me, the way forward is the feminine.

Working our way through “rules” of life by “feel” and by the concepts of “connection” and “partnership” rather than the rules of “power” – which, I believe, was invented by men for our survival, and then continued by men for many other reasons.

It’s time to create SAFETY for everyone – and to do it in a way of partnership and connection.

Femininity must rise.

Femininity must simply be buoyant and rise up – because pushing and shoving and defining is all masculine energy – and it has brought us where we are now – to the good and beautiful, as well as the painful and terrible.

It all starts with us women.

I call this now Femifesting (which has been around for awhile, described as “radical feminism”) or “Girlfesting.” Which do you like better?  I always lean toward the word “girl” as a quick “label” for anything feminine – to stay AWAY from all words that seem to be (whether or not they are originally) derived from the words “male” or “man.”

Let’s call this a new way of “bringing form to feelings…”

Love, Rori