My situation is my Husband had an affair with his ex girlfriend. they use to date before I met him. We’ve been Married for 16 years and we lived together for 13 years, before we got married. So we’ve been together total 29 years. I love him very much and don’t know how to win his Heart back. He said he does not know how he feels about me and thinks he is in love with this other women. He told me he care’s about me and does not want to hurt me.
I’ve told him to move out to think about what he wants, but he is still at the house with me, and still sleeping with me in the same bed. We have sex once in a great while, but yet he says he does not feel anything with me. I am so confused and hurt, and don’t know what to do any more. I keep telling him that I love him and want to fix what is wrong in our relationship, and he has not said much about it. What am I to do? ‘Lost his Love.'”
Lost His Love, Welcome – and I’m going to have to tell you the short version – which is – invest NOW, in my ebook and Modern Siren. If you can, get Reconnect, too, it will give you a real foundation for what you’re about to do. I hardly EVER talk about my programs – the link to my catalog page is in the right-hand corner of the blog (“to programs”), you can get them that way right now – and there’s just no other way we can move this as fast without you actually having, listening to, watching the Tools in action. They will save this marriage this WEEK – I’ve seen it happen.
So – download the ebook now, and then get Modern Siren as fast as you can.
You can do this – I’ve seen it happen over and over. You must STOP doing everything you’re doing and change EVERYTHING about you this very minute.
Go change your hair (go as long as possible, do not cut it – but change the color – put blond in it – have the hairdresser layer it and either curl it or straighten it – just so YOU feel different)
Go to Target or Ross or your nearest thrift store, even, and get tops in solid colors that are DIFFERENT. – I suggest RED – you’ll have to find the RIGHT color of red – don’t go orangy-red, go cranberry and berry red. Get tight jeans and sexy, lacy tops. Try skirts if you never wear them – show some SKIN. Everything needs to look good on you to YOU, so bring a friend for feedback and reassurance, or ask the men in the store what they think. Look through magazines to help you get a feel for a new, sexy look for yourself. Get new shoes – get a pair of high heels and wear them when your man is around – just as you are about to…
GO OUT THE DOOR!! You need a class, an event, a whole schedule of fun, sexy things – try an acting class or improvisation class, or stand up comedy class- somewhere where there will be Men – and where he KNOWS there will be men. Go out for coffee with these new friends you’ll make. Come home late.
Okay – I’m totally serious about this – do this today!!!
Remember – this is not about being sexy for HIM – this is about being sexy for YOURSELF – and for OTHER MEN. Yes – other men. You’re going to have to flirt, you’re going to have to get validation and feel attractive to other men out there, you’re going to have to up your self-esteem and your Degree of Difficulty. You have to learn Strong Surrender.
You’re going to have to throw yourself out in the world and be HAPPY – and feel completely unconcerned about him – in other words you’re HAPPY to feel free and experience all these new men out there (do NOT let your gremlins and whatever anyone else says throw you off this – you have to be on a “high” around this. Being a “sad sack” is just going to KILL whatever’s left of his attraction for you.
There’s just too much to say to do it here – but I’m feeling excited for you – because I KNOW you can do this. Go take a Pole Dancing class while you’re at it. Here’s to you! Let me know what happens after you have the book, you’ve digested it and are using ALL the Tools, and you have Siren and are effectively Circular Dating.
Now – to finish – STOP calling yourself “Lost His Love” – stop TELLING him you love him and want him back. I don’t want you to PRETEND to feel differently – I just don’t want you to TALK ABOUT IT.
I want you to talk about all the COOL things you’re doing. I want you to get excited about things that have nothing to do with him. I want you to become interesting to yourself again. I want you to pull your energy away from him and the marriage and put it on YOU.
I promise you – if you do this, for real, from the ground up, from the inside out and the outside in, you’ll see results with him within a week. But you have to do the Tools – no amount of wishing is going to do this. Get shopping and get out there right now!