Why Do I Have To Do All The Work To Improve My Relationship With My Man?

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It can be frustrating and discouraging when it feels like you’re the only one putting in effort to improve your relationship with a man. 

The thing is, because relationships are a two-way street, and because both partners have a responsibility to work on their relationship – if he’s not willing, or not comfortable, or just doesn’t have the abilities and skills to even talk about stuff – you’re left holding the bag.

You can either walk away, or stay and complain, or be the one to open things up.

Here’s a few reasons why you might feel like (and actually BE), the one doing all the “work’:

1. Different communication styles: It’s possible that you and your man have different communication styles, which can make it difficult to connect and work through issues together.

 For example, you might prefer to talk things out while your man prefers to keep his feelings to himself.

2. Different expectations: You and your man may have different expectations for what a healthy relationship looks like. 

If your expectations aren’t aligned, it can be challenging to work together to improve your relationship.

3. Past hurts: If there’ve been issues in your relationship in the past, it’s possible that he’s hesitant to open up and work on things together because he’s afraid of being hurt again.

Regardless of the reason, it’s important to have an open and honest conversation with him about how you’re feeling. 

You need to let him know you feel like you’re doing all the work.

You’ll have to literally ask him for his perspective on the situation. 

Yah. It sucks, and yet – if you think of it as not “doing work” – but opening up the door to a really great relationship because your man just doesn’t have the skills you have to even open the door, much less walk through!

Think of it as expressing yourself in a way that feels heartfelt – and yet hearable even by a bottled up man.

Think of it as expressing yourself in a way that feels good, and has potential to make you so much happier!

Think of it as expressing yourself in a way that’s inspiring to him.

Everyone has different skill sets.

Perhaps one of your great skill sets is, and might always be, to open the door and “model” how to walk through it!

So – it’s not so much “work” as your awesome Feminine Energy expressing itself.

Love, Rori

 

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